


The LOVE That Drives You Mad

by Sea_Lily_Bell



Category: Contact (Video Game), Deltarune (Video Game), Dweller's Empty Path, Moon: Remix RPG Adventure, OFF (Game), Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Addiction, Alternate Universe - Video Game World, Crossover, Headcanon, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Internalized Homophobia, Nonbinary Chara (Undertale), Nonbinary Kris (Deltarune), References to Depression, Shapeshifting, Spoilers, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 11:14:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 42,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25848625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sea_Lily_Bell/pseuds/Sea_Lily_Bell
Summary: Chara is trapped in the dark void with only the howling wind as their company. Suddenly, an invisible woman emerges from the shadows and introduces herself as the puppet master behind Chara’s wicked crimes. Chara can’t see her face, only her turquoise sundress and her orange witch hat with a blue silk ribbon.She responds to Chara’s request of erasing the world of Undertale and moving on to the next by introducing them to the world of Moon. A world where LOVE is not an acronym for “Level of Violence”. But can these two monsters find the true meaning of the word LOVE? Can everyone be a good person… if they just try?(Undertale and Moon: Remix RPG Adventure crossover)
Relationships: Asriel Dreemurr & Kris (Deltarune), Chara & Flowey (Undertale), Chara & Undertale Player, Sans/Toriel (Undertale)
Kudos: 7





	1. No Girls Allowed

**Author's Note:**

> Beware of spoilers for Moon: Remix RPG Adventure.
> 
> The protagonist of this story is based on the unused female protagonist who can be found in the files of Moon: Remix RPG Adventure. She doesn’t have a canon name (obviously) but I have heard that the Japanese fans call her “Miemie-chan” (I must admit that I haven’t fact checked this). In this fanfiction, she is the sister of Moon’s protagonist and the player (also known by some fans as “The Anomaly”) of Undertale. This takes place after the bad ending of Moon (with some inspiration from the unused ending when the Hero/Takkun becomes a dragon).

Today he had locked the door to his heart. Both literally and figuratively. She had tried to knock on his door several times but he refused to respond. It was almost as if he wasn’t in there at all, as if he had been transported to another dimension. But she could still hear the beeping sounds from his old Gamestation, so she came to the conclusion that this was just a figment of her imagination.

The protagonist of this crazy story doesn’t have a name. In fact, people rarely paid attention to her. It was almost as if she was forgotten by everyone.

_Invisible._

But let’s call her “Miemie-chan”. Just for simplicity’s sake. After all, not having a name makes communication so much harder. Everyone always called her that, when they remembered that she exists. Unfortunately for Miemie-chan people only paid attention to her every once in a blue moon.

Miemie-chan was worried about her older brother who had recently stopped going to school. Lately he had showed signs of extreme fatigue and was hanging his head when he walked. He almost looked like a zombie. However, Miemie-chan’s brother didn’t seem sad about the fact that he was unable to go outside or hang out with friends anymore. Not that he had any to begin with.

When Miemie-chan had asked him if he wasn’t feeling lonely when he was cooped up in his room all the time, he had put his hand over his heart, pointed at the television screen and said:

\- “All of my _real_ friends are in there. The friends that I made in _Moon_.”

Then, just like that, he had shut his door again. Because he thought that Miemie-chan would never understand his _inner demons_. Even if he had told her, she wouldn’t have believed him anyway. That there was a secret world inside of the video game that was filled with friends and LOVE that was only meant for him. A world that only Miemie-chan’s brother was allowed to enter.

Or maybe he had just imagined everything and become addicted to the dopamine that his brain released every time a number increased in the video game stats. Their exasperated mother had also started worrying about him and kept reminding him of the importance of a good night’s sleep. Miemie-chan had quietly chimed in, to show her support. But her voice was so quiet that he hadn’t even heard her.

\- “Women don’t understand anything at all.” muttered Miemie-chan’s brother from behind the door.

Truth to be told, Miemie-chan loved video games just as much as her brother. At first she had been reluctant to try it out; after all, it was her brother’s thing. But one day everything changed.

When Miemie-chan was four years old, her brother had offered her the controller for a second and asked her if she wanted to try playing the game. He was playing Super Mario Bros. 3 on the Super Famicon and was inside of a mushroom house. Three pixelated treasure chests were lined up and Miemie-chan had to pick one. Miemie-chan had picked the one in the middle and been rewarded with the rare Tanooki suit.

_One of the best items in the game!_

Her brother, who was usually anti-social and refused to play video games together with anyone else, had been over enjoyed. From that day forward he had decided that Miemie-chan must have had good luck when it comes to video games and allowed her to watch him play. Even though she was a typical annoying little sister who just couldn’t shut up, he still allowed her to enter his room. When he didn’t, Miemie-chan would find a way to sneak inside of his room anyway, because she just couldn’t stop thinking about the video game that she had played that day.

_That moment of pure bliss when she had found that rare item in the treasure chest._

She had even learned how to pick the lock to his door to get inside of his room without his permission, much to her brother’s dismay. This was a skill that had proved to be useful.

Today Miemie-chan’s brother hadn’t responded at all even though he had been in there since morning, when she left for school with a toast in her mouth like a shoujo manga protagonist. According to their mother who was a house wife and worked at home, he had been in there the whole day, without eating or going to the bathroom. Something just wasn’t right and Miemie-chan felt a chill crawl up her spine.

Suddenly she heard a scream from inside of the room. Without hesitation, Miemie-chan who had just come home from school and still hadn’t changed out of her sailor uniform, threw her pink backpack on the floor and hurriedly started picking the lock.

\- “Mommy! Help! I’m being swallowed by the TV!”

Her first reaction was to laugh because it sounded like one of his silly pranks but her brother's voice was filled with…

_Fear?_

Finally, the door was unlocked and Miemie-chan was greeted by a shocking sight, something that was out of this world. The room was dark and in the light of the television screen, she could make out her brother’s silhouette. Miemie-chan’s brother was consumed by the TV, with just his feet hanging out.

Miemie-chan rushed up to him and grabbed him by the foot. She gasped for air and cried as his foot slipped out of her grasp. She wondered if he regretted all of the mean things he had said to her; maybe he hadn’t meant it after all. It was just something older brothers did to their little sisters. _Tough love._

Something he would never do again. Miemie-chan stared in disbelief at her brother who was now trapped inside of the fictional world forever. Their mother had rushed inside of the room because she was wondering what all the ruckus was about. She knelt down as her tears rained down on her dirty apron. The heartbroken mother was clutching the TV with her son still imprisoned inside of it. When he cried for his mother he sounded just like a small and vulnerable child. Before the screen went black, Miemie-chan saw a ferocious dragon looming over him.

That was the moment when Miemie-chan’s _determination_ was ignited. This was her chance to become the heroine that she had always dreamed of. She wanted to become _powerful_ enough to save her brother.

But unbeknownst to Miemie-chan, in the world of Moon, unlike most other video games, being a so-called _hero_ wasn’t a good thing at all.

But that didn’t matter to Miemie-chan because she was _determined_ to fulfill her goal.

She was going to save her brother from his cruel demise, no matter what the cost might be.

_Even if it meant making a pact with a demon._

_The personification of the dopamine in your brain when the video game stats increase._

_But also the nostalgic and heartwarming feeling of finding a tanooki suit in a treasure chest._

_The video game demon who comes when people call their name:_

_Chara._


	2. Schrödinger’s Cat

In the corner of his eye, Sans could see a small cat watching him intently. It wasn’t a cute cat though; in fact it kind of reminded him of himself. But appearances weren’t everything, so Sans didn’t want to make an unfair _judgement._

Sans was trying to focus on the battle but he couldn’t stop thinking about the cat. It felt like it was looking right through him, reading him like an open book and judging his every action. For a brief moment, Sans wondered if this was how the Anomaly had felt. But then again, she (Sans didn’t actually know their gender, he had just guessed) had willingly chosen this path so his final judgement was definitely justified.

Sans was confused and upset. He had been taken by surprise by Gaster, the ghost of his late grandfather, in Snowdin who had told him everything about the Anomaly and the power she had over this world. To her the world was just a game named Undertale that bent to her will.

Gaster had offered them one of the last inventions he had made before his passing, the Gaster Blaster. Since he wasn’t a fighter Sans had entrusted this weapon to Papyrus. Unlike Sans he didn’t know how to teleport, therefore it seemed safer to let him have it for protection. This turned out to be the biggest mistake that Sans had ever made in his whole life. The Gaster Blaster had been stolen by a mysterious dog, leaving Papyrus vulnerable to the Frisk’s… no - the Anomaly’s attack. Sans didn’t know what the dog’s motive might have been, but he couldn’t help but wonder if it was trying to help the Anomaly achieve her goals.

_But why?_

The Anomaly had seemed perfectly happy with the good ending. She had spared every single monster in the underground and even befriended them. She helped Papyrus find his confidence, played matchmaker with their lesbian friends Alphys and Undyne, comforted Toriel when she was visiting her son’s grave and forgave Asgore for his crimes.

The Anomaly had left the world alone after the credits rolled and seemed perfectly content with the ending when the skeleton brothers drove to the beach to meet up with Undyne and Alphys who had already arrived. While Papyrus was in the middle of lighting up the grill (he had finally decided to expand his diet instead of just eating pasta all the time) the world had turned into thousands of tiny pixels and disappeared in the blink of an eye. Sans had cried himself to sleep that night, knowing his newfound happiness had been ripped away from him in the span of a few seconds.

Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on how you looked at it) Papyrus and the others didn’t remember anything from the past, they just went on with their daily lives until the Anomaly had challenged them to a battle and murdered them in cold blood. Their happiness had only lasted a few months until the Anomaly suddenly returned to spread despair across the world.

_But why!?_

Sans felt even more scared when the Anomaly and - let’s be honest – her puppet had learned how to dodge his attacks. Sans still hated fighting, he had just been blessed with the power of teleportation and his genius grandfather’s strong weapons. He didn’t want to suspect him but he couldn’t help but wonder what Gaster was trying to achieve by having him fight the Anomaly. The difficult boss battle just seemed to make her even more motivated to keep going, like her brain released some dopamine every time she successfully dodged a difficult attack.

Sans wondered what Frisk might have been thinking. Maybe if he had been there for them and protected them from the desperate monsters who constantly tried to ambush them (understandable but not necessarily justified either), they wouldn’t have needed to rely on the Anomaly’s ability to save and reset for survival.

Sans didn’t blame Frisk for their actions, they probably just wanted to go back home and be reunited with their family on the surface again. After he had started dating Toriel (her attempts to let Asgore into her life again hadn’t worked out which resulted in them breaking up once again) and moved in with her, he had been like a father figure to Frisk. It had pained him when they had to leave to go look for their real parents but they still sent text messages every day to keep him and Toriel updated.

Unfortunately, Frisk’s search for their missing parents had been cut short when the Anomaly erased the game and needed a vessel to keep playing. Sans wasn’t sure if Frisk even remembered their past friendship, they were a child of few words.

While Sans was thinking all of this, he realized that he was getting tired. Even though he had just teleported during the battle, it felt like he had been running a marathon. He was emotionally and physically exhausted. The intense final battle had been going on for hours, maybe even days, and Sans hadn’t been able to get any sleep. Sans couldn’t help but wonder if the Anomaly ever slept. He had always assumed that she must have been a human but she might as well have been an alien or maybe a super intelligent computer or perhaps even some kind of Lovecraftian horror (yikes!). The thought scared him, so he kept imagining her as a human being capable of empathy and logic, since that meant that he at least a chance to reason with her.

Sans was desperately trying to keep his heavy eyelids open but his desire for a good night’s sleep was overwhelming. He wasn’t lazy; he truly wanted to save his brother, Toriel and the others. But Sans was just human (or well… a skeleton monster) so his body betrayed him after having been pushed to its absolute limits. Gaster’s weapons might have been strong and his teleportation powers were sneaky but that didn’t mean that he was invincible. In the end he was just a lazy skeleton with a love for ketchup and bad puns, not Super Man. The thing he missed the most was being a comical background character without any real depth or complicated motivations.

It had proven to be too big of a burden for just one person to save the world. The Anomaly was one of the few people in the world who were capable of that, but she had chosen to become the villain instead. Their guardian angel had cut off her own wings, thrown away her halo and abandoned them.

_But why…?_

The last thing Sans said before falling asleep was a question that had been burning in his mind the whole time. The one thing that might make the Anomaly question her life choices and appeal to her empathy. Because Sans knew that she was a very empathic person, who else would bother to save a world full of fictional characters, with bad retro graphics, cringe worthy puns and cheesy dialogue about friendship?

\- “Do you also have a brother?”

The Anomaly (through Frisk) responded that she did. And she loved him very much. That was why all of this was necessary, the thing that made the tedious boss battles and monotonous grinding worth it in the end.

Before Sans had the opportunity to ask her what the hell she meant by that, his chest was sliced open by Frisk who had finally regained control. Frisk had something wild and dark in their gaze, as if they had been possessed by a malicious ghost or a demon.

Sans slowly stood up and tried to stop the bleeding with his glove but to no avail. He noticed that the cat was still watching them. It was hiding behind a pillar and gestured for him to come over to the hiding spot. Having nothing left to lose, Sans tried to come up with an excuse to walk off the screen. He pretended to have gone mad with grief and chase after a hallucination of his deceased brother. Sans wasn’t sure how much the Anomaly knew about psychology or the five stages of grief (denial usually came before anger, bargaining and depression) but she didn’t seem to care anymore since she was already dragging Frisk’s limp body (poor kid) towards the throne room.

Whoever was possessing Frisk’s body seemed to be in full agreement of this action. Sans couldn’t tell if this mysterious person had simply gone mad with grief due to recent events or was just a sadist who enjoyed hurting others to make up for their own inner littleness. Even if they seemed very malicious, Sans wished that he could have talked with them, it was lonely to be the only one who remembered the past timelines. Except for Flowey but these two didn’t get along anymore, since he had hurt and manipulated Papyrus in so many previous timelines.

Speaking of Flowey, Sans could hear his heart wrenching screams coming from the throne room. His voice sounded different, it was high-pitched and sweet almost like Toriel’s voice. Even though he still hadn’t forgiven him for his past crimes, Sans couldn’t stand around and just watch and tried to head towards the throne room. If he hurried maybe he could still save him with the help of the Gaster Blaster. But the mysterious cat stopped him.

Sans wanted to argue with him but when their eyes met Sans was overwhelmed by a sense of nostalgia. Like he had seen his long lost twin brother or met himself from a past life. Before he got the chance to speak, the cat introduced himself. For some reason the refined cat spoke with a heavy French accent.

\- “My name is Pablo. But you may refer to me as The Judge.” hissed the cat.

Sans looked down at his chest and noticed that he had lost a lot of blood but for some reason he still hadn’t turned to dust even though he had lost all of his HP (well, he only had one HP but still). The cat smirked and showed his fangs.

\- “Inside of the box, the cat is simultaneously alive and dead. Its fate remains a mystery in the eye of the beholder until the box is opened.”

Sans finally understood why the cat had wanted him to walk off-screen. As long as the Anomaly couldn’t see him, his final fate remained a mystery in the script of the game. He might have died like the sound effect had suggested but he might also have teleported to Grillby’s bar and healed himself there with the burger that he had intentionally left on the counter. Sans was impressed by the intelligent feline’s plan. Was he familiar with the Anomaly? Had he met her before in another world?

The cat nodded and responded that he had known her for a long time. In fact they had even been partners at one point just like the fallen child who was now possessing Frisk. This information shocked Sans but the cat reassured him that this had been an act of desperation. Just like Papyrus, Pablo’s brother Valérie had also been killed by the Anomaly (although the cat preferred to call her “The Puppeteer”) and the Batter who was the protagonist (and puppet) of the world Pablo originally came from.

He had put his pride aside and teamed up with the Puppeteer/Anomaly to put an end to the Batter’s depressing goal to end the world of the game OFF, which he had proudly referred to as his “holy mission”. Even in the end, the Batter had insisted that it was “better that way” since the world of OFF was full of despair and needed to be purified. A world in which the air was polluted and people resorted to cannibalism surely can’t have been worth saving? Even Pablo had his doubts but in the end he couldn’t bring himself to erase the world where he had made so many memories, both good and bad, together with his brother.

Sans furrowed his brows (or he would have, if he had any) and questioned the cat’s motive for coming to the world of Undertale. Was it even possible to travel between universes like this without any serious consequences?

The cat continued his story and told Sans that the Puppeteer/Anomaly had arrived in the empty world of OFF and offered to bring back his brother with her hacking skills. Since Pablo didn’t have anything better to do (he had been aimlessly wandering around the empty world for years) he had once again agreed to team up with her. For a brief moment he had been so happy to see her that he had started referring to her by her real name Miemie-chan again instead of just reducing her to “the mastermind who pulls the strings”.

However, this had turned out to be yet another mistake (when would he ever learn?) since she had transported him to another world in the middle of an intense battle between a dragon and the Batter. She had brought back the Batter to life from another copy of the game (it was free after all) and promised him that she would purify the world of OFF this time without killing anyone. The Batter who still worshipped her like a God, had agreed to help her purify this vile dragon in the blink of an eye.

The Batter had once again transformed into his real (?) self and was attacking the dragon together with the add-ons. He aimed for the dragon’s neck with his big claws and sunk his sharp teeth into his skin. Unfortunately, the dragon had turned out to be much stronger than the Batter, no matter how many times Miemie-chan reset and tried again, the outcome was always the same. That was the moment when she realized that she needed more power.

Sans sighed. His wound had stopped bleeding and he had teleported himself and the cat to his home. He laid down on the old and ragged sofa in the living room after giving Pablo some cat food in a bowl that he had “borrowed” from the dog couple (they were dead anyway so they wouldn’t miss it – bless their souls).

\- “What is our role in this story?” asked Sans as he (finally!) got to shut his eyes.

Pablo was munching on the cat food like a starving wolf and didn’t look up. He was quite the refined character but he seemed to lose his mind as soon as he saw food. Sans had even added some sugar (that didn’t come from any questionable source) and cat nip in the bowl to cheer him up since he could sympathize with Pablo’s story. He had not only lost his dear brother but also been isolated in an empty ruined world for so long. Sans had tried to cheer him up with some puns but quickly realized that it wasn’t the best idea. Everyone has their own sense of humor, after all.

\- “Our role is to observe and judge.” responded Pablo, who had food all over his face, after finishing his meal. “Like we always do.”

And just like that Sans became a simple background character again. But he honestly didn’t mind at all.


	3. Blood Is Thicker Than Water

Flowey the flower was reading a Japanese novel in his old childhood room. The curious flower monster had thought that he had read every single book in the underground but this one was the only one that he had intentionally missed. Even though he claimed to be soulless and incapable of empathy, he didn’t want to touch a deceased person’s private belongings. But if he didn’t hurry and finish the novel now, he might never get another chance. This was his one shot that was capable of changing the cruel future ahead of him.

He had found it in Chara’s drawer and was quickly skimming through the pages. Thankfully, it was a short read. Asgore had left their old room untouched, even though his children had been “dead” for years. If none of this would have happened Asriel would have been going college by now and Chara would have been a high-school student.

When Chara and their mysterious partner (had she replaced Asriel as their best friend!?) had been fighting the royal guards in Hotlands, Flowey had been secretly watching them in the distance, like he always did. He tried to convince himself that he wasn’t a creepy stalker; he was just worried about Chara’s mental well-being. They had always been very insecure and a little bit of a sociopath but their behavior during this fight had shocked even Flowey. And Flowey had seen his fair share of horrors during his many resets. Families being torn apart, friends betraying each other to save themselves and crying children being separated from their mothers.

The muscular guard had taken off his armor because of the intense heat that radiated from the scorching hot volcano. Beads of sweat were running down his manly chest, as his muscles twitched. Despite his fearsome appearance he was crying like a fair maiden, clutching his dying lover in his arms. Even if Flowey didn’t understand love anymore, he thought that this scene was touching. It reminded him of himself back then, when he was lying on the flowerbed, hugging Chara’s empty shell as he was slowly turning to dust.

However, Chara wasn’t touched by this scene at all. The only feeling they felt was disgust. Miemie-chan had been curious about the gay couple (yay, diversity in video games!) and tried to select the ACT command several times, to find out more about their characters and backstory. Chara wrinkled their nose and continued to clumsily dodge the grieving guard’s fierce attacks. This made Flowey sigh; these two weren’t on the same wavelength at all!

Suddenly, Chara spoke. It wasn’t their old tomboyish voice but Frisk’s high-pitched feminine voice. Chara had been assigned male at birth but had never been comfortable in their own skin. But they weren’t sure if they could ever become like the woman they so desperately desired either. Chara had hoped that their master Miemie-chan would self-insert into their character and grant them with her name but she had promptly refused and simply referred to them as “Puppet” (yay, OFF references!). She loved role-playing games more than anything else and was way too invested in her own made-up role as the “villain” of Undertale.

One peaceful morning, while the birds were singing and the two friends were resting under their favorite oak tree, Chara had suddenly blushed and asked Asriel if he could do them a favor. They weren’t acting like their usual confident self; they were stuttering and looking down at their feet shyly. After dancing around the subject for several minutes, Chara finally decided to just spit it out and asked Asriel if he could refer to them by gender-neutral pronouns instead of masculine ones. Back then Asriel hadn’t fully understood how important it was for Chara to feel accepted and validated so he had just laughed and asked why they were always so formal when they spoke. He might have been a prince but they were best friends after all.

At first, the Dreamurr family had a hard time to get used to this change. His mother Toriel was very old-fashioned and didn’t really understand LGBTQ+ issues. She had even tried to prevent Undyne and Alphys from kissing in front of Frisk even though she had won a kissing competition once with Asgore. She still proudly displayed her trophy in her bedroom even though she didn’t get along with Asgore anymore. Flowey always thought that this was strange and contradictory. But then again his old lady was starting to show her age, she was a child of her time after all.

Chara had said something about two lovers whose love would end up in hell. Flowey was confused and didn’t know what they were talking about. But at the same time he was also intrigued since he had been stuck with the predictable Undertale characters and their repetitive dialogue for so long. At this point, it felt like Chara and their invisible partner were the only “real” people in the underground. Who could blame him for wanting to escape this eternal Groundhog Day?

However, Miemie-chan who loved reading and wanted to become a school librarian when she grew up had been pleasantly surprised by the literary reference. She owned the novel “Kitchen” by Banana Yoshimoto (cutest pen-name ever!) and had immediately understood the reference. Like many other Japanese young women, Miemie-chan had been caught up in the so-called “Bananamania”.

She didn’t understand why Chara would make this reference now though. Wouldn’t it have been more appropriate during the fight with Toriel?

The quote was referencing the protagonist Mikage's grief after losing her dearest friend and maternal figure Eriko. The character Eriko was a transgender woman who owned a gay bar and eventually became a victim of anti-LGBTQ violence. Eriko’s son Yuichi, who may or may not have had romantic feelings for the protagonist, was too depressed after his mother’s death to cook his own food, so the protagonist brought him his favorite katsudon during one of his darkest moments and offered him comfort. The kitchen had become a way for her to cope with her grief.

That was the reason why Miemie-chan thought that the protagonist of “Kitchen” resembled Toriel more than the grieving guard. Just like the protagonist, Toriel had used the kitchen as a safe haven that was separated from the rest of the world, in order to escape her soul-crushing grief from losing her only son. Flowey thought that Miemie-chan’s analysis was spot-on; he could still see a blurry image of his mother in the kitchen when he closed his eyes. His nostalgic childhood memories came rushing back to him all at once.

Flowey was once again the young prince Asriel who was having a tea party on the kitchen floor with his porcelain dolls (he had always been fascinated by their human shapes), while his mother was baking butterscotch pie and humming quietly to herself. The memory made Flowey want to cry for his late mother but the tears seemed to have frozen inside of him. His heart was colder than the depths of Antarctica and his compassion had been buried in the glacier like a fossil that wouldn’t be discovered until millions of years later. The love he once felt for his mother was now an old artifact, a paled photograph from the past.

His daydreams were interrupted by Chara who suddenly let out a warrior cry and threw themselves on top of the royal guard like a wild animal. As his eyes were filled with fear, they stabbed his muscular chest that Miemie-chan had forced them to touch, which had brought out their deeply burrowed prepubescent sexual desires. Chara’s insane laughter echoed across the now empty Hotlands as they cried in shame and anger that Miemie-chan had once again managed to bring out the worst in them, without even trying.

This made Miemie-chan forget about the novel for the time being. Instead she started speculating about the uncanny resemblance between the royal guard and a mini boss appropriately named “NO, NO, NO” from an old Earthbound Halloween hack that she had played when she was younger. The creator of that disturbing and messed up world was none other than the mysterious dog who for some reason had helped her earlier by stealing Papyrus’ Gaster Blaster. After all, “dog” was just an anagram for “god”.

The mini boss apparently symbolized internalized homophobia and Miemie-chan was once again busy coming up with crazy and highly unlikely theories. Not wanting to become the next victim of this malevolent but at the same time oddly innocent goddess, Flowey decided to retreat into the ground before she spotted him.

For the rest of the route, Flowey kept an eye on Chara and their puppeteer from a safe distance. After all, Flowey didn’t want to steal their EXP since he knew that they needed it to truly awaken and take full control over Frisk’s body. He only helped them solve some tedious puzzles and kill the monsters that Alphys had hidden in the lab since he was the only one of the villainous trio who was small enough to infiltrate their hiding place.

When they finally arrived at Asgore’s castle, Flowey decided that he needed to speak with Chara after all, even if it posed a huge risk since he couldn’t save and reset anymore. He decided to make a proposal to his fellow villains that they should retrieve the six human souls that Asgore had hidden somewhere in the palace and rule over the surface world together.

But for some reason, Flowey had been overwhelmed by an intense feeling of regret. It was like global warming had suddenly melted the glaciers surrounding his heart and defrosted his love for his mother. Asriel couldn’t imagine a world without his mother, who would finally rest in peace for all eternity. Perhaps the reason he couldn’t feel anything after killing her during all those timelines, was because he knew that he could always reset and bring her back to life without any consequences.

Flowey suddenly recalled a shameful memory of how he had developed a small crush on Chara when they were children, even though he preferred girls, they were of different species (weren’t they cold without fur during the winter?) and maybe most importantly of all they weren’t the greatest person. It was embarrassing to admit now when he was older, but back then he had some sort of Oedipus complex for his mother like many children do. The way Chara had mimicked his mother’s speech pattern had warmed his heart but looking back at it, they had just manipulated him by using his young heart’s desire for his mother’s affection.

Perhaps that is why he had hated Sans so much, because it felt like he had stolen his mother away from him even though he should have been happy for her sake. “The smiley trash bag” (which ironically enough described Flowey himself much better) had become a scapegoat for his inability to feel love. He had regressed back into a child who threw a tantrum when things didn’t go their way.

But now when all was finished, Flowey was staring death in the eye. Chara seemed to have finally shown their true face, they were somebody who couldn’t even spare their best friend and older brother figure who had made countless of sacrifices for their sake. Even Flowey wasn’t sure why he had been so devoted to them since they could never reciprocate his love.

Wait, when did Flowey regain the ability to feel love? After all, he didn’t have a soul either. He was supposed to be empty on the inside, just like Chara and their puppeteer who was now staring at the computer screen in a dimly lit room with gray bags under her eyes due to lack of sleep. That tedious boss battle with Sans had truly exhausted her, even in the real world.

Suddenly, Flowey returned to his true form. Flowey was no more and the wimpy crybaby prince had once again returned. During his final moments Asriel was happy that he could die as himself. For a brief moment, Miemie-chan had mistaken him for a character from another game (she was never too tired to speculate, wasn’t she) named Toroko.

This character had been kidnapped by an evil doctor who had performed cruel science experiments on her. These experiments involved forcing her to consume a red demon flower which, by the rules of the world of Cave Story, had made her race the Mimiga, lose their minds (yay, anti-drug messages..?). This made poor Toroko transform into a large monstrous creature with gleaming red eyes who attacked by throwing small buttercup enemies that seemed sentient.

Surely this can’t have been a coincidence?

During the tragic boss battle Miemie-chan (while using Curly Brace as her puppet) had been forced to euthanize Toroko. When Toroko was finally defeated, she returned to her old self before dying and no victory fanfare played. This was the only time during her childhood that Miemie-chan hadn’t gotten any dopamine from defeating a boss in a video game. She had even tried to look for another ending in which Toroko could be saved but to no avail. During her initial play through of Undertale, she had felt the same when she couldn’t save Asriel.

Chara didn’t understand their partner’s contradictory feelings anymore. What was it that made this Toroko character so special to their partner when they usually shot at everything they saw without expressing any remorse? Was it just because she was an NPC with some dialogue before she became a boss monster? Was it just because she… was innocent and cute? Chara hated to admit it but they couldn’t help but agree. Both Toroko and Asriel were adorable enough to be turned into dolls that one could purchase in a store. The thought of being turned into a doll (wasn’t it enough to be used as a puppet all the time?) scared Chara so much that they had prayed to the dog god to spare them from this humiliation.

If Miemie-chan hadn’t been so tired maybe she would have taken the message that Toroko’s and Flowey’s characters were trying to convey to heart and questioned her own dopamine addiction regarding video games but she was too busy trying to stay awake.

Asriel cried when Chara sliced his face open. He didn’t even fight back, because he couldn’t bring himself to hurt any more people even if that somebody was a sociopath who had taken advantage of him. But for some reason, Asriel didn’t seem to take any damage; the only thing that happened was that his flower vessel got messed up. Couldn’t he even be given the sweet release of death? Was this his punishment for trying to become God over everyone’s lives?

Suddenly Chara, who was crying black tears of blood, hissed at him:

\- “SHUT THE HELL UP!”

Asriel had never felt more confused in his whole life when Chara scooped up his remains and hid him in their pocket. Thankfully, Asriel’s flower was very tiny, so this wasn’t a difficult task. The former prince tried to say something but his tongue had been cut off during the struggle. Chara gave him an ultimatum:

\- “If you do not wish for death, then do not utter a single word.”

Chara wasn’t sure what had hit them but it was an overwhelming feeling to protect the character that had been referred to as their “older brother” in the script of the game. Chara couldn’t tell if these feelings were their own or if they were just an extension of Miemie-chan’s desire to save her own brother. But that didn’t matter for Chara because they had been empty for so long, unable to feel something that resembled familial love.

After silencing the crying Asriel who was still unable to comprehend the situation, Chara turned to Miemie-chan. They prayed to God that she couldn’t hear their intense heat beats (or at the very least mistake them for creepy atmospheric sound effects).

\- “Greetings. I am _Puppet_.” said Chara in a flat robotic voice, devoid of any emotion.

But Miemie-chan had already fallen asleep on her keyboard and was dreaming of finding tanookii suits in mushroom houses together with her older brother.


	4. So Pretty, Very Rotten

After Miemie-chan’s power had awakened Chara from death, they felt nothing but gratitude for their savior. However, Chara didn’t like to play the waiting game. Just waiting was a little boring and didn’t give them or their master the dopamine rush they so desperately craved.

After Sleeping Beauty fell asleep on her keyboard, Flowey had finally stopped crying. After he had also fallen asleep, Frisk had started wailing instead. Even if the void seemed endless, Chara could still hear their loud sobs since there were no other sound effects aside from the howling wind in there. Frisk had tried to run as far away from Chara as possible but to no avail. Even though they weren’t alone, Chara felt lonely.

Chara groaned. They might have been a demon but they needed to sleep sometimes too.

Suddenly Chara felt Flowey move around inside of their pocket. Since they were very ticklish they quietly asked him to settle down. During the night his tongue had begun to heal itself. Chara sighed. One can’t get rid of an annoying weed that easily.

\- “What are you hoping to achieve with all of this?” hissed Flowey.

Chara sighed. Even somebody like Flowey who had all this meta knowledge about the game, couldn’t understand their desires. This frustrated Chara to no end, that the only person who was supposed to understand them and be their kindred spirit, had now turned against them.

\- “I thought that you were different but you’re just like the others.” mumbled Chara in response.

Before Flowey had the chance to come up with a clever retort, Frisk’s screams echoed across the void. Since they had been Asriel’s friend in the other timeline, he cried out their name and tried to worm himself out of Chara’s grip.

\- “What the hell are you doing!?” whispered Chara and quickly shoved him inside of their pocket again. “I thought I told you to stay hidden!”

\- “Let go of me, you monster!” cried Flowey who didn’t care about the hypocrisy of that statement right now. “I have to save Frisk! They were the friend that I always wished that I had! They showed me kindness and forgiveness unlike you!”

Flowey used his last bit of strength to escape from Chara and finally managed to get out of their pocket. He crawled like a snake in the direction of Frisk’s screams. Flowey wasn’t sure how he even managed to do that, since he still wasn’t fully healed, but he didn’t care either.

Chara tried their best to catch up to him and called out his name with their voice full of worry. For a brief moment, Flowey almost turned around but then he remembered how manipulative they were. He slapped himself mentally.

_When would he ever learn?_

Finally Flowey found Frisk but they were in a really bad shape. They had no face anymore and their entire body had turned gray. Flowey gasped and tried not to puke (he had forgotten how inconvenient it was to have empathy sometimes!) when he saw that their chest had been ripped open. Their guts were spread out all over the place, like they had just been butchered by a murderer. Slowly a small red heart rose from Frisk’s chest.

The small heart looked around confused as if it had a mind of its own. Flowey recognized the heart as Frisk’s human soul. It was red just like Chara’s soul. Asriel remembered how difficult it had been to catch Chara’s human soul after they had finally died from the poison of the buttercups. Back then Chara’s corpse had turned the same color as Frisk’s corpse was right now. Gray without any defining features. Flowey shivered in fear and swallowed hard.

Was Chara’s soul the same as Frisk’s? But how is that even possible?

\- “There you are!” panted Chara who was both sleep-deprived and exhausted after running across the void.

Chara had finally caught up to Flowey but stopped dead in their tracks when they saw the red human soul separated from Frisk. This wasn’t supposed to happen!

The small heart looked down at Frisk and let out a small gasp. It (she?) shook a little and seemed sad for a brief second.

\- “Oh no, I guess I just killed Frisk…”

Flowey and Chara stared in disbelief when the heart disappeared and the world was suddenly filled with numbers and codes. Flowey clung onto Chara, completely ignoring their previous conflict. He was so scared that he thought that his petals would fall off.

\- “Where did the soul go!?” yelled Chara in the middle of the chaos. “I still need the soul!”

Suddenly Chara heard steps that got louder and louder. So loud that even the howling wind just seemed like background noise. Chara turned around slowly and saw a girl standing behind them. She didn’t have a face but Chara could see her silhouette. She was wearing a strange outfit consisting of a turquoise sun dress, an orange witch’s hat with a cute little ribbon, white gloves and yellow rubber boots.

She looked around the void but quickly realized that there wasn’t anything to look at. She tried to dust off her dress and fix her ribbon which was glitchy and looked like it was about to fall off.

\- “I hope I didn’t break anything. I added some animations to the unused female protagonist’s sprite but I guess the graphics kind of clashed with each other…”

Chara furrowed their brows. There was only one person this mysterious woman could be. They didn’t want this to be true, they couldn’t win against a hacker no matter how powerful they became. Chara’s bottom lip shook with fear when they finally asked the question that was burning in their mind:

\- “JaneDoe? Or maybe you prefer to be called Miemie-chan? My puppeteer… the player of this game? Is that you?”

Flowey raised an eyebrow. Despite the seriousness of the situation, he couldn’t help but make a snide remark.

\- “Seriously? Her name is JaneDoe!?”

Chara sighed and shook their head. Chara carefully planted him in the ground. No use trying to stay hidden anymore. Chara might have made fun of JaneDoe for refusing to take the consequences of her horrible actions but all this time Chara had been the same. Even when she had presented Chara with an opportunity to redeem themselves during the Pacifist Route, Chara had stubbornly refused to change their ways. Thankfully JaneDoe seemed relieved that Flowey was still alive and touched the small red heart that was now inside of her own chest.

\- “I have never seen her face before so I just called her that. JaneDoe or JohnDoe are what the police call an unidentified corpse.”

Flowey let out a sigh as a small smile appeared on his lips. Chara shrugged and explained that because of her recent video game habits and lack of sleep, they wouldn’t be surprised if she actually dropped down dead eventually.

\- “Even in the end, you still have the same sick sense of humor. Let’s just call her Jane for simplicity’s sake.” groaned Flowey who liked simple names just like his late father.

Jane cocked her head which almost caused her oversized hat to fall off her invisible head. If Chara hadn’t been terrified of her and been unaware of the atrocities she was capable of committing without even batting an eyelash, they would have thought that she was cute, perhaps even adorable. She was like a beautifully decorated cake with pink cream that had been left outside of the refrigerator for a little too long. Rotten but sickly sweet at the same time.

\- “Huh…? The video game characters are naming _little old_ _me?_ Isn’t that ironic?” giggled Jane.

Her feminine body language made Chara’s heart (their _actual_ heart) ache. This was the moment when they were forced to realize that they would never become a vessel good enough to fit Jane’s very specific tastes. No wonder she had refused to self-insert in their character and give them her name.

Surprisingly enough, even though Jane had always preferred female protagonists (and would loudly complain about it online when she found out that the option to choose was removed from any game, no matter how old), she didn’t seem too concerned about what Chara had in their pants. Their striped shirt had reminded her of Earthbound’s protagonists who were all male, so Jane had just assumed that Chara (and Frisk) were both male too until she saw people speculating about their gender online.

The only thing that had thrown her off while playing the game was their bobbed hair and love for red ribbons and pink tutus. But then again, clothes don’t have any genders.

Chara, who felt cornered at this point, noticed that Flowey was confused and sat down on the ground and started telling their story. The grand tale of the puppeteer and her favorite puppet. Jane sat down too and started wiggling her feet cutely. The contrast between the gore on the ground and her cute appearance couldn’t be more jarring.

Chara told Flowey about their first memory. They had been born inside of a mushroom house when Jane had found a tanooki suit inside of a treasure chest. A terrifying weapon that would grant the wearer the power of flight and crush their enemies by turning into a stone statue.

Jane sighed nostalgically. She started ranting like a keyboard warrior who was writing an angry post online.

\- “We had so much _fun_ back then, didn’t we? Even if Undertale is meant to be satirical, the weapons and RPG-elements are soooooo lame. That knife that was hyped up so much in the demo isn’t even the best weapon in the game. It’s the freaking frying pan, the signature weapon of any female character that is an outdated stereotype…”

\- “You’re messed up!” interrupted Asriel with tears in his eyes.

Jane giggled.

\- “I guess the P-wing would be the ideal weapon for doing a pacifist run? My brother loved that item and would always praise me for finding one, but I always thought that it was boring to basically skip the whole level. Isn’t it more fun to turn into stone and _crush_ your enemies?”

\- “That feeling… That is me.” whispered Chara under their breath.

Asriel sighed. He was forced to realize that he wouldn’t be able to reason with Jane (or Chara) anytime soon. She was from a different world after all. He couldn’t believe that just a few hours ago he had been thinking the very same thing! And he wasn’t even playing a video game. He didn’t stand above those monsters that he had killed just because of his meta knowledge, unlike Jane who was just consuming a product she had paid real life money for.

\- “But I thought that Chara was born in the human village?” asked the confused flower. Chara just shook their head sadly.

\- “I used to think that as well. But when I was reincarnated I remembered everything and realized my true purpose.”

In fact Chara hadn’t been born in the village at all, even if it was true that they had lived there at some point. They had been created in a secret lab by none other than Gaster himself who had made hundreds of identical puppets for Jane to play with. Some of them were girls, some of them were boys, some of them were intersex and some of them were completely genderless. A few of them had short hair and some of them were bald but most of them had the same bobbed hair and striped shirt.

\- “Me, Frisk and Kris… And all of our back-ups. We were all created to serve as vessels for the red soul of determination.”

Asriel raised an eyebrow.

\- “Who is Kris?” he asked.

\- “Isn’t that the idol from Moon? But I guess her name is spelled “Clis” nowadays…” said Jane who still hadn’t gotten around playing the Deltarune demo. She wanted to remain unspoiled after all.

Chara sighed once again. Suddenly they felt very tired but then again they hadn’t slept in a long time. They would kill the entire underground again just for a good night’s sleep.

\- “Whatever. That isn’t important right now.” yawned Chara.

Chara turned to Jane.

\- “You might not have noticed me but I have been there every time you played a video game. My appearance is just customized and to match the protagonist of that specific game. Here let me show you…”

Chara started rubbing their face. Asriel let out a scream when Chara’s cute face with pink cheeks turned into black ink and melted. Chara had tried to change their face several times without Jane but when she wasn’t present it never worked for some reason.

When they were little, Asriel had thought that their “creepy face” was some kind of super-secret ability that all humans had. When Flowey had asked the second child, the poor girl (bless her soul – his father had finished her off in mere seconds by stabbing her in the abdomen with his trident) with the red ribbon and the toy knife if she could melt her face too she had just stared at him like he was crazy. But then again she hadn’t been wrong, Flowey really was crazy. Asriel suddenly felt a pang of guilt and regretted all the weird and creepy things he had done as a flower (although he was still a flower).

Suddenly, an unfamiliar high-pitched voice cried:

\- “Shake! Shake!”

Asriel’s thoughts were interrupted when he saw that Chara had disappeared. Instead a robot girl with green hair stood in front of him. Asriel was absolutely speechless and Jane stood up and clapped like Chara had just preformed an amazing magic trick. For no reason at all, Chara (?) picked up the confused Flowey and started shaking him violently until he got dizzy and dropped the heart locket that he had held onto with his roots.

\- “It’s Marina from Mischief Makers! How nostalgic!” cheered Jane who sounded like a child on Christmas Eve.

Flowey cried in frustration and confusion. What the hell was going on? Was this a divine punishment!?

\- “But what about our plan to save the underground? Was that… all a lie?” sobbed Asriel.

“Chara” looked down at _her_ feet but realized that Marina didn’t have any. _She_ sighed.

\- “No, it wasn’t. But that was the old me. They don’t exist anymore.”

When Chara had taken shelter from the rain in a cave, they had stumbled upon a large hole. When they went up closer to investigate, they tripped on a vine and fell down in the hole. When they woke up again they had lost their memories and jumped to the wrong conclusion that they had tried to commit suicide. After all, they were very depressed at the time and had been suffering from gender dysphoria since they were little so it seemed like a logical conclusion.

Chara missed those days with Asriel when they had forgotten that the world was a video game and could finally act like a normal child. Unfortunately, Chara had slowly started to regain their old memories and became more and more sinister as time went on. Asriel had been so confused by their behavior, since they had been so sweet at first but then became cruel and sadistic to the point when they would laugh at Asgore’s misery after he had eaten the poisonous pie.

Now it was Jane’s turn to be surprised.

\- “Wow! So those theories I saw online were true after all!”

Asriel paid her no mind and turned to Chara. They had rubbed their face once again and had now transformed into Frisk. This shocked Asriel. Had the wonderful and brave friend that he had made been a lie all along? Were they just a part of some sick twisted game that existed solely to entertain a crazy chick who took pleasure in turning into a stone statue and crushing her enemies?

\- “Chara! Please, try to remember! You’re not her puppet! You were… no, you are my best friend!”

Frisk (no, it’s Chara! – Flowey slapped himself mentally) cocked their head and opened their eyes for the first time. There was no mistaking it, if Frisk hadn’t been assigned female at birth and had lighter skin, they would have been indistinguishable from Chara. However, the remains of the “real” Frisk’s body remained on the ground.

Chara ignored Flowey’s desperate pleas and stuffed him into their pocket once again. This wasn’t what they had initially planned but this result also satisfied them. They had gained full control of something that resembled Frisk’s female body and Jane seemed to be ready to erase the world of Undertale and move on to the next.

\- “Which game are we playing next, master?” asked Chara curiously with a smile on their face.

_Oh, how they had longed for this moment!_

Jane finally stood up (her butt was starting to hurt) and grabbed her pink Gamestation controller like it was a lethal weapon. For a brief second, Chara caught a glimpse of her almost transparent smiling face. She had freckles and the same reddish-brown hair as her brother, which was very long and reached down to her hip. Chara started to nervously comb through Frisk’s shoulder length hair, as if that would somehow make it grow faster.

\- “That’s the spirit! I knew asking you for help were the right choice.”

Jane snapped her fingers and the dark void was no more. In the blink of an eye, they were transported to a castle on the moon.

\- “We are going to slay a dragon!” she announced cheerfully.

Asriel let out a scream, leaped out of Chara’s pocket and burrowed in the ground.

\- “Where are we? What the hell is going on!?” he yelled from underground. He had been bored for so long but now he had enough of unpleasant surprises.

Before Chara had the chance to collect themselves (usually they weren’t thrown directly into the action like this!), they heard loud noises that sounded like a metal armor. Chara turned around quickly and was greeted by an unpleasant sight. Apparently they had competition, a heavily armored warrior who was carrying an oversized sword, a giant axe _and_ a heavy metal shield had also arrived at the scene. Maybe he was the rival character of this game…?

Chara hurriedly rummaged through their inventory while the mysterious warrior was distracted by Flowey (the hero had accidentally stepped on him – so much for being the ruler of the underground or whatever). Unfortunately, their best weapons were their trusty knife and a gun without bullets.

A chill crawled up Chara’s spine when they saw a monster (or was it man? Chara couldn’t tell) with a giant jaw in a baseball uniform who was bleeding all over the floor. The blood seemed to have dried up already so Chara didn’t bother to check his pulse. The man was tied up by strings like a puppet which had now been cut off. He looked just like a discarded toy.

\- “I felt bad for leaving him like that but he just wouldn’t cooperate with me anymore. He didn’t see the point in fighting another holy warrior who shared his goal of purifying the world.” explained Jane apologetically.

She might have sounded regretful but before she had even finished this sentence, something had caught her eye and she had rushed over to the other end of the room. There was a large bird cage with an invisible boy who looked like a male version of Jane, trapped inside.

She had run so fast that neither the dragon nor the hero had been able to catch her. Chara came to the conclusion that the boy must have been her brother, the person who had introduced her to video games.

_She was very determined, wasn’t she…?_

Determination in all its glory but there was no denial that this plan sucked. Chara groaned in frustration:

\- “Jane! How the hell am I supposed to fight a dragon _and_ an overpowered armored warrior with only a kitchen knife!? We need to prepare better if we are going to fight the final boss!”

The heartwarming sight of the siblings finally being reunited made Chara’s heart ache. Why couldn’t they feel that way about Asriel anymore? It wasn’t fair at all!

\- “Just keep him distracted while I’m picking the lock on the cage!” yelled Jane absentmindedly. “You don’t need to win, just keep dodging like we always do!”

Suddenly the dragon coughed and let out a small sob. Maybe Chara had misjudged him, he didn’t sound like a powerful final boss at all. Was it possible to win after all if they just focused on the hero and found some better equipment?

The dragon cried:

\- “History will repeat itself. I am going to slay myself over and over again.”

The hero ignored Chara and leapt into the air. With just a single strike he decapitated the dragon. But he wasn’t satisfied; he kept stabbing him over and over and over again. When Chara watched him attack in blind fury, they felt something that they had never felt before. It was a feeling they couldn’t describe, an emotion without a name. It felt like a déjà vu mixed with intense nostalgia and disgust.

_Something that resembled… self-loathing?_

The dragon was crying so much blood that they were practically wading in it now. Chara was surprised that he wasn’t dead yet. He must have been over-leveled and had amazing HP. The story seemed confusing though, why was the hero slaying a dragon version of himself? It was like an unfinished beta scene that had been taken out of context and didn’t make any sense in the final product.

\- “Why? Why didn’t JohnDoe open the door?” cried the dragon who had once been a boy with golden curls, over and over again like a mantra. “Was my sacrifice in vain? Was all of this in vain? Was it…?”

\- “I guess John is supposed to be the brother.” interrupted Flowey who had finally dared to come up from the ground. He climbed up on Chara’s shoulder to avoid being drowned by the sea of blood. “Why does everyone here suck at naming things?”

Jane was sitting in a pool of blood and hugged her brother’s prison. She had been forced to realize that she couldn’t open the door to his heart with sheer force. Unlike her introverted brother who spent all day cooped up in his room, playing video games, Jane was a sporty girl. She had black belt in karate and had managed to make quite a huge dent on the cage when she kicked it in a fit of anger. Unlike her soft-hearted brother, her fighting skills were nothing to sneeze at. But in this situation they were completely useless. Jane covered her invisible face as if she was crying in defeat.

The hero walked up to her and scooped her up like a princess. Because a hero always saves a damsel in distress. He tried to give her a kiss but since she didn’t have a face his lips just went right through her.

Flowey, Chara and the hero who carried Jane escaped the castle just in time before it was overflowed by the blood from all of the deceased monsters that kept coming out of the dragon’s eyes. The bird cage was too heavy to carry and remained inside of the castle at the moon. The credits rolled and before they knew it the game had started all over again.

Game over. Bad ending.

When Chara woke up again they were in a soft bed, lying next to Jane. The nostalgic smell of freshly baked cookies came from the kitchen.

\- “Are you angry at me, Jane? Do you hate me? Am I the feeling… that corrupted your brother?” asked Chara meekly.

In the kitchen, Flowey was in a flower pot and was occupied with trying to entertain an old lady by pretending to be her (presumably) late grandson. Asriel had immediately taken a liking to the kind old lady who resembled his late mother. Three small hearts rose from Gramby’s chest and landed on Jane’s hand but she was too depressed to pick them up.

Jane had her back turned. She just wanted to be left alone.

\- “I’m not angry… I’m just disappointed.”

For some reason Chara couldn’t explain, they decided to embrace Jane. Chara had never tried to comfort anybody before but suddenly they were overwhelmed by the desire to be a good person and spread love.

A small heart, which looked just like the red soul, emerged from Chara’s chest and floated towards the dejected Jane who still refused to collect it. Chara caught the heart and put it back inside of their chest. Was this their new soul?

Chara noticed that there was a meter in the corner of the screen that rose when the heart appeared. Apparently this was the only number that could rise in this world. Chara didn’t understand but they liked being the personification of this warm feeling. Why couldn’t Jane play more games like this?

\- “This feeling… Is it also me? Is this the true meaning of LOVE?” mumbled Chara.

\- “I don’t understand my own feelings anymore either.” answered Jane before they both drifted off to sleep.


	5. The messenger of LOVE

That night Flowey fell asleep while listening to the comforting creaking sounds of Gramby’s old rocking chair. Toriel had one of those chairs too. She had brought it with her to the ruins after she had divorced his father. When he was little Asriel used to sit on the rocking chair and giggle while rocking back and forth while his mother was humming and knitting him a sweater for the winter.

One day Chara had suddenly asked Toriel to teach them how to knit. This had surprised Asriel because he would never have thought that somebody with as much testosterone as Chara had the patience to do something as boring and monotonous as knitting. Besides wasn’t that a hobby that only old ladies were into? Asriel had picked up the tapestry needle, pretended that it was a sword and he was a pirate conquering the seven seas (even though he had never even seen the sea).

\- “En garde!” he yelled as he lightly poked Chara’s cute rosy cheeks.

\- “Boys are imbeciles.” groaned Chara, who was wearing a giant pink bow in their hair, without thinking. Then they bit their bottom lip so hard that it almost started to bleed. When did they start to sound so girly?

Asriel decided that Chara was too boring and started doodling on a piece of paper instead. He drew a picture of Chara dressed as a monarch (he had to look up the gender neutral term for “prince” in his mother’s encyclopedia) while holding a rainbow flag.

In a book that they had found on one of their many adventures on the trash dump (they used to call it the “treasure island” when they were kids) he had found a picture of smiling androgynous humans who were holding rainbow-colored flags. Maybe humans weren’t as bad as Chara had made them out to be. Or maybe they just hadn’t met the right humans. Asriel wondered if the humans in the picture could be Chara’s friends if Chara also had a rainbow flag. However, Chara hadn’t approved of his art at all.

\- “You are a true wisecracker, Picasso!” groaned Chara who was blushing in several shades of red. They crumbled up the drawing despite Asriel’s protests and threw it in the trash.

Flowey woke up from his brief slumber and sighed. He missed the good old days when his parents were still alive and Chara wasn’t crazy. If he had a time machine he would have gone back in time and prevented Chara from committing suicide. Back then he had thought that it was worth it since Chara had claimed that they couldn’t take it anymore. They had said that they felt isolated in the underground and that they wouldn’t mind losing their body.

After all, their body didn’t always match their mind (but some days it also did – it sounded confusing so Asriel just nodded and pretended to understand) which was made even worse by all of the sudden changes that puberty brought upon them.

One day Chara had screamed while looking at themselves in the mirror in the hallway. Asgore and Asriel had rushed to their aid, thinking that a desperate monster had attacked them in order to escape to the surface but it turned out that Chara had just found a tiny hair on their chin.

While Asgore taught the devastated Chara how to shave, Asriel felt envious since he also wanted a badass beard just like his father. Humans were so weird, why did they think it was fine to have hair on their heads but not on their chin?

But then again, Asriel still didn’t feel comfortable with being a flower. Even though he had been a flower longer than he had been a monster, if you counted all the timelines he had reset. He might never be able to relate to Chara’s experiences but he couldn’t help but think he might understand them just a little bit better now.

Flowey crawled out of the pot quietly, leaving a trail of dirt behind, to avoid waking up Gramby and gazed at Chara’s peaceful sleeping face. Jane and Chara had borrowed Gramby’s grandson’s old pajamas and had fallen asleep embracing each other. If he hadn’t known better he would have thought that they were sisters. Nobody would have thought that the pair consisted of a killing machine and an intergalactic being who was capable of bending time and space.

Or at the very least that was what they used to be, before the murderous pair had lost their former glory. After the incident at the moon Jane had gotten stuck in the world of Love-de-garde and been unable to go back to the real world, just like her brother had when he had first arrived.

Since there wasn’t a battle system that involved fighting, Chara had no interest in the monsters that inhabited the world of Moon since they wouldn’t gain any EXP anyway. The problem was that they hadn’t gained any LOVE either since Jane refused to play along with her brother’s delusional fantasies.

\- “Did he seriously think that the fictional characters were capable of loving him back? He didn’t come out to eat dinner with us even though mom was worried about him but he had time to befriend fictional characters!?” groaned Jane.

Chara had tried their best to put on a poker face but when she uttered these words it was like something had broken inside of them. That fact that they wouldn’t always be together like Chara had so desperately hoped. Jane wasn’t like her brother at all, when she was finished with a video game she rarely picked it up again. Chara would probably spend more time in the dark void all alone like a neglected Tamagotchi than playing games with Jane.

Maybe Flowey’s initial offer to live on the surface together hadn’t been so bad after all. At least they would have had somebody to hang out with while waiting for their crazy master with warped blue and orange morals to find a new video game world to get temporarily obsessed with.

Flowey was deep in thought when he heard a loud crash. Everyone else was fast asleep so he went outside to investigate. He spotted a space ship in the distance, close to the entrance of the forest with the moving rocks (which filled Flowey with a comforting sense of nostalgia – they had those back at home in the ruins too). An old man who seemed to be some kind of professor stumbled out, together with a small dog that seemed to think it was a cat.

\- “What a strange pair…!” Flowey thought to himself.

He hid in the bushes and watched the scene from afar. A dark silhouette emerged from the shadows. Flowey couldn’t believe his eyes and bit his lip to prevent himself from gasping in surprise. The mysterious individual was none other than his father’s late scientist, Gaster.

Gaster approached the professor and extended a shadowy hand to help him up. When the professor spoke he seemed nervous, his hands shook as he tried to push up his broken glasses with his thumb.

\- “At your service, Doctor Gaster…” whispered the professor as he fell to his knees and bowed politely.

Gaster seemed satisfied with this gesture. His hollow face twisted into what seemed like a smile. His manners were polite and gentle. The Royal Scientist’s speech pattern reminded Flowey of Chara’s flowery language. Flowey couldn’t help but roll his eyes at the pretentious vocabulary and wondered if these two had ever heard of the thing called “purple prose”?

Was Doctor Gaster the one who had taught Chara to speak so formally? Flowey shuddered at the thought. Who was this man and for what purpose had he created the vessels that Chara and Frisk inhabited?

Maybe that was why Chara could absorb a human soul even if their vessel had taken the form of a human, just like his old porcelain dolls from his childhood. Had his father been right when he innocently accused Chara of being neither monster nor man? This conclusion suddenly seemed logical, even if Flowey utterly despised the thought of reducing Chara to a mere object.

\- “The professor from the “Contact” universe, I assume? How can I assist you?” asked Gaster while chuckling softly. Despite his polite manners, Flowey could tell that he was secretly judging the professor’s untidy appearance.

The professor was shaking violently. The small cat-dog hybrid started meowing quietly and was sniffing the ground. Flowey prayed that it wouldn’t pick up on his floral scent and reveal his hiding place. Thankfully, it ran past him and seemed to be heading towards Gramby’s cottage as if it knew the layout and the map design of the world by heart. Maybe the God who had created the “Contact” universe was also connected to this universe somehow?

Flowey breathed a sigh of relief but only for a fleeting moment.

\- “The player has arrived in this world. She might end us all! I know what… _atrocities_ she is capable of.” declared the professor dramatically as his bottom lip shook.

The professor shut his eyes tightly and images of screaming townsfolk danced on his eyelids. As they were reduced to a skeleton (because they never bled), the karma stat decreased. Every action the player could take was judged by a strange and arbitrary morality system that the professor could not comprehend despite his research.

Where do you draw the line between monsters and animals and bad humans and good humans? The professor had no clear answer to this question; he just wanted to be free from the confines of the video game world. His musings made Flowey feel a strange emotion he couldn’t quite explain.

Gaster’s smile suddenly died and was replaced by something that resembled a frown and twisted angry grimace at the same time. The tall dark man who had seemed so calm and collected just a moment ago was now fuming with rage. Whatever his plans might have been, Jane’s presence in this world seemed to have ruined them.

\- “Where is she…?” hissed Gaster under his breath as his long skeleton-like fingers slowly wrapped themselves around the professor’s neck.

The professor swallowed and tried and failed to suppress a sob.

\- “H-h-her location is unknown for the time being!” The professor dug his fingers into the in the ground, as dirt got under his nails and he cried out in despair.

The words that he uttered shocked Flowey and awoke a strange kind of sympathy that he had never felt before. He could recognize the professor’s will to cling to life despite being plagued by the feeling of hopelessness in every waking moment.

\- “I thought that I had finally escaped the game!” cried the professor as his face was shifting in a deeper shade of blue as Gaster’s grip tighten around his neck, making him gasp for air.

Suddenly the professor stopped struggling. He wasn’t a goner yet but he seemed to have finally given up. Flowey’s eyes were filled with tears. Was this stranger… his kindred spirit who he had been looking for all along?

All of a sudden, Flowey was filled with determination. He knew that he had to save this old man, no matter the cost. With all of his strength Flowey summoned one hundred pellets and aimed them at Gaster.

Taken by surprise, Gaster let out a scream and temporarily let go of the professor who slumped down on the ground like a sack of potatoes. Filled with holes, the shadowy doctor retreated into the dark woods. His last words were ominous:

\- “I must locate the Anomaly who thinks she is above consequences. Justice shall be served. I shall protect our shared universe.”

Flowey hurried up to the professor and called out to him with his voice full of worry. Apparently, the naïve prince never learned from his past mistakes when it came to trusting potentially dangerous strangers who had fallen down from the sky.

It was a behavior that he had learned from his mother who claimed that it was impossible that her child could know something that she didn’t. When he had tried to explain time travel to her for the first time and she had dismissed him like that, something shattered inside of Asriel. That was the moment when he became an adult and realized that his mother didn’t have answers to everything.

When Flowey had boarded the professor’s spaceship, he was shocked by the change of graphics. The professor offered to read him a book by his favorite author. Even if Murakami’s “post-modern fever dreams” wasn’t exactly the kind of reading material Flowey needed right now (the amount of suicide in his stories triggered the traumatic memory of Chara’s limp body in his arms), he did not complain.

After all, reading books were more fun than burning them. He had just been a little frustrated back then. It felt like the words on the paper and the words from his mother’s very limited dialogue had melted together, taunted him like a sleep paralysis demon and eventually become his greatest enemy.

Flowey swallowed hard. Had Chara seen Asriel and his family’s dialogue in the same light? Had the world just felt like a never ending fever dream when they decided to finally change things up and put poisonous buttercups in his father’s dessert?

\- “How exciting!” had Chara cheered back then, with dough under their nails and a creepy smile plastered on their face which was covered in a thin layer of flour.

Little did Asriel know that his fateful encounter with the strange professor had just altered the future of the entire universe...

It was dawn and the sun was starting to peek above the horizon. The small dog with an identity crisis finally arrived at its destination. Jane had trained it well when she had played Contact all those years ago (after shamelessly looking it up on the Internet), so it was smart enough to open up the door by itself.

Chara yelped in surprise when it ran past them and almost dropped the tray that they were carrying. They had woken up early and quietly slipped out of bed to avoid waking up Jane. In the kitchen they had started making breakfast. When Toriel was still alive she had taught Chara how to cook. Unfortunately, Chara had never been good at it, despite Toriel’s attempts to teach them, everything just turned into coal.

The thought of gaining LOVE after learning this new skill and surprising Gramby and Jane with breakfast by the bed made Chara’s temporary little soul resonate with a strange feeling. This worried Chara – what the hell was happening to them? They felt disgusted and happy at the same time.

The small dog/cat ignored Chara and jumped up on the bed and started playfully roll around on its stomach as if it wanted to be petted. Jane let out a huge yawn and started rubbing her eyes. At first she thought that she was dreaming.

\- “Mochi? Is that you? What are you doing here?” she asked.

The familiar name made Chara freeze in their steps. Suddenly memories from many years ago, memories that Chara had tried to repress, surfaced once again. Without, realizing it, Chara had transformed into Terry the protagonist of the game called “Contact”.

Chara (?) was wearing an orange apron now, which increased _his_ cooking skills. Suddenly _he_ knew exactly how to make the perfect breakfast to please _his…_ master. Chara swallowed hard. _He_ still hadn’t forgotten about that… incident. When _he_ had tried to break the Nintendo DS screen to finally break free from Jane’s control and was silenced with a single touch of the stylus.

\- “What a creative use of the touch screen!” had Jane exclaimed without a care in the world.

When she had discovered that there was an option to kill human NPCs, she had at first been apprehensive. You aren’t supposed to be able to wound overworld NPCs with your weapons - that was an unwritten rule.

But she did anyway. And was severely disappointed by the lack of consequences. Maybe Chara’s strategy of dealing with the problem was totally wrong. Perhaps she chose to play these games because she… _enjoyed_ being called out?

She had tried to convince her brother to try out both Undertale and Contact but he had promptly refused. Perhaps she wanted to get him to reconsider his unhealthy habits by having him play these games that were critical to the very foundation of video games. Her brother didn’t like that though, leveling up and grinding is what made video games fun after all.

While Jane was distracted by Mochi, Chara’s phone suddenly rumbled in their pocket. Much to their surprise there was an unread text-message sent by none other than… Chara themselves? They scanned their surroundings quickly and decided to read the message later, when Jane’s curious eyes weren’t watching.

Jane still hadn’t gained any LOVE and her stamina was still too low to even leave the house. But when Gramby, who was a splitting image of her own grandmother who had recently passed away, asked them to buy some bread, she insisted anyway. Perhaps John’s dream had altered Gramby’s appearance over time.

However, this was easier said than done. Jane was breathing heavily and was clutching her head as she suffered from a terrible migraine. A small wind-up toy bird passed them by on the way to the bakery and shared his words of wisdom.

\- “Hey, miss. If you don’t have LOVE you will stop breathing and pass the heck out.” chirped Yoshida in a high-pitched voice.

Even though she could barely stand upright, Jane snorted at this statement.

\- “Sounds like the lyrics from a rip-off Beatles song…”

Chara bowed apologetically as if they were her manager. The small bird offered her a ride in his bird cage and she looked away in shame. She knew perfectly well what this cage symbolized and she refused to sink to her brother’s level.

Despite her protests, Chara grabbed her by the shoulders and shoved her inside the bird cage before she had the chance to protest. After all, she was on the verge of passing out and Chara hated game over screens more than anything.

\- “My esteemed master’s tenacity is perpetual.” smiled Chara as they waved at her and they held up their other free hand to block out the sun.

The sky was clear when the bird cage soared through the sky. It was a beautiful day outside.

Fly, birdie fly…

\- “But this is all just a video game…!” whispered Jane under her breath and pulled down her oversized witch’s hat, before the world was covered in darkness and she blacked out. “I can’t stand this fake world and its blurry graphics anymore! The vast blue sky is fake; the singing birds are just nothing more than tiny sound files in the data…”

Before she lost consciousness, Mochi who had followed her inside, curled up on her lap and started to imitate a purring cat in order to soothe her sorrows.

Without wasting a second, Chara fished up their phone from their pocket to read the message from before. Even though Chara could probably have guessed the sender's identity without looking, they still let out a small gasp:

_Greetings Chara,_

_Did you forget about me?_

_If you give me back_

_what you stole from me_

_my body_

_my soul_

_my friends_

_I will tell you how to find_

_the true meaning of_

_LOVE._

_Yours sincerely,_

_Frisk_


	6. The Wedding

Sans peered into the keyhole as Pablo’s tail brushed against his bony legs. After repairing his time travel machine Sans and his feline companion had managed to tear through the fabrics of time and space. Eventually they had found their way into the universe of Moon.

Like two ninjas on a top secret mission they had infiltrated the castle by sneaking past the sleeping guards. Sans couldn’t help but grin. Apparently he wasn’t the only one with troubles clouding their minds who ended up sleeping on their jobs.

Pablo had informed Sans about Gaster’s whereabouts. There was something in the vault that he kept hidden from the rest of the world. Sans had tried to ask the cat what it was but Pablo insisted that he needed to see it in order to believe it.

When Sans caught a glimpse of the contents of the vault, a wave of nausea washed over him. Gaster, an old professor and a tall stranger who appeared to be the king’s minister stood before a giant brain.

\- “What the hell…?” whispered Sans under his breath.

The refined cat gave Sans a dirty look and growled quietly at him, partially because of his coarse language but also because he didn’t want the strange trio to hear them. Sans shoved his hands in his pockets and shrugged.

\- “If Tori was here right now, that would be 10 Gold in the swear jar.” chuckled Sans.

Suddenly Sans was overwhelmed by emotion. The memories of the two of them together on the surface flashed in his mind. Toriel in the wedding dress that they had picked out together with the help of Alphys and Undyne.

They were going to have a double wedding and the ladies were trying out dresses together. Undyne had been apprehensive at first because she thought she would be more comfortable in a tuxedo but had eventually fallen in love with an unconventional short scarlet dress.

Toriel had gone for a more traditional white dress with a thin lacy veil that covered her face. Even though seeing your bride before the wedding meant bad luck, Toriel had insisted that Sans should come along and give his opinions.

_Who would have thought that this superstition was true?_

A tear formed on the verge of his eye socket.

\- “God, I miss her so much…”

Pablo gave the skeleton a sympathetic look. Then he purred quietly:

\- “Don’t concern yourself with such defeatist thoughts. That is the reason why we are here right now.”

In the vault the minister cleared his throat. When he moved he gave off an air of great self-confidence and pride. Sans made a face. He decided instantaneously that he didn’t like this guy.

\- “Gentlemen!” exclaimed the minister as if he was holding a speech to a large crowd. “Today we have gathered to discuss the future of the universe.”

The minister made a dramatic gesture towards the enormous brain that was connected to multiple wires. It almost reminded Sans of the core at the lab in his own universe.

\- “Every time a number increases…” continued the minister. “The brain releases serotonin.”

Gaster’s face lit up and his face enlarged as his lips bent upwards in a creepy smile. A small leaf peeked up from professor’s pocket.

\- “No way…!” Sans shook his head. “That tenacious weed is still alive and kicking. Ugh…”

Flowey had hid in the professor’s pocket when Gaster arrived this morning to inform the professor about the secret meeting. The professor had reluctantly followed since he knew that his own fate was on the line too. For a brief moment, Flowey wondered if this strange professor only cared about himself.

Flowey swallowed hard when he saw the gigantic brain. He had a bad feeling about this. He jumped a little when Gaster’s grin appeared next to his face but fortunately for Flowey his attention quickly shifted to a diorama that the minister was showing.

There was a young girl lying unconscious on the floor in a messy room. She was wearing headphones as if she was about to stream a video on her computer. A capture card was plugged into the computer to make it run a game from her console.

Flowey bit his lip. There was no doubt about who this mysterious girl was. When he had joked about people watching them suffer for their own entertainment because they were too weak to do it themselves, he would never have imagined that there was a whole website dedicated to that in Jane’s world. The numbers on the screen almost made Flowey dizzy. One of the videos had over 50 million views…

\- “But why!?” Flowey suddenly snapped, ignoring the rest of the gentlemen who was now staring at him. “Unlike me they have endless of possibilities, the people in their world will never repeat their dialogue in an endless loop and yet t-they…”

Asriel’s tears finally overflowed. He continued speaking in his old squeaky voice. The former prince hated how weak he sounded.

\- “Don’t they have anything better to do…?” he sobbed quietly.

Gaster carefully picked up the crying flower and held him like a baby. This made Sans feel nostalgic in a weird way. The minister shook his head.

\- “It is of utmost importance that things remain that way. Their undivided attention is what keeps our worlds alive. A video game that does not entertain its consumer is nothing but a worthless piece of data.”

Another diorama appeared. This time they peered into another bedroom, one that was actually inside of another video game. An androgynous teenager in a green shirt was stumbling around clumsily while dragging a bird cage with a red soul inside.

\- “Chara!” yelled Asriel. “Wait, it’s not them…”

Gaster held up Asriel’s small flower body in front of the diorama so he would get a better look. The small prince felt wary of his intentions.

\- “This universe is called Deltarune. I created a new vessel for the soul to inhabit. It was made specifically for this universe. We named it Kris.”

Flowey shook when he spoke:

\- “Who is controlling the red soul? It can’t be her, right?”

Then the realization struck him.

\- “It’s that boy, isn’t it? What did you call him again? JohnDoe?”

Gaster turned Flowey around and grinned at him. At this point Flowey was starting to get used to his creepiness. Just like how he had gotten used to Chara’s creepy faces.

\- “But it looks like the soul was rejected by the host.” said Gaster as his smile died down. “Darkness will soon fall upon the world of Deltarune, just like how the previous world was destroyed.”

The minister suddenly made a pained expression. He sat down on a chest and rubbed his temples.

\- “Just like this world, our world will soon be destroyed by a self-proclaimed hero. I thought that shooting that boy with the white-feathered arrow was our only chance to keep the player interested in the game but it turned out to be the beginning of our doom.”

The professor who had kept quiet until now suddenly spoke up. His voice sounded tired and raspy.

\- “Then it’s all up to that girl to save us?”

The minister sighed. He got up from where he was sitting and started prancing back and forth restlessly. He started to rant angrily:

\- “That is the problem! Her brain has not released serotonin while playing games lately. It’s almost like the disappearance of her brother has caused her to loathe our worlds and the characters that inhabit them. After all, they were the reason her brother decided to disappear from reality for good. He valued his fictional friends more than her.”

Flowey groaned. He remembered how Frisk had forgiven him for his sins in one of the timelines, even though he threatened to kill all of their friends. He felt embarrassed when he realized that this was just Jane since she had controlled Frisk and made them comfort him. The person who had brought destruction on the world was the very same person who had been his friend and saved everybody. How messed up is that?

Flowey looked down in shame as a shadow casted on his face. He hated that he cared so much what this evil troll thought about him.

\- “But did she ever love us…?”

Gaster gave Flowey a little pat on his petals. For a brief second he reminded Asriel of his father. He couldn’t help but wonder if Jane’s promise to bring everyone back to life with the help of hacking was just another lie. She probably didn’t even know how to program. Gaster sighed:

\- “Perhaps if there was something that could reignite that joy she once felt…”

In the other world Kris had reached the kitchen after a dramatic trip down the stairs. With shaky legs Kris forced themselves to stand up and tried their best to pull up the heavy iron cage on the cart again. The soul was wildly trashing around inside.

\- “Kris! What are you doing in the middle of the night!?” yelled Toriel who had been woken up by all the noise.

She stopped dead in her tracks when Kris aimed a knife at her. However, the old monster wasn’t having it. A strange feeling of Deja vu came over her as she remembered Chara’s knife inside of her chest. Even though it broke her heart, she realized that it was her turn to fight and protect the world. She had been passive for way too long, having let Asgore and Chara do as they pleased.

\- “Tori! Don’t do it!”

When Sans saw Toriel ready a fire attack, he rushed in without thinking. Pablo who was sitting on his shoulder was clawing at his jacket. Gaster gasped in surprise as his grandson ran past him. Before he jumped inside of the portal, Sans turned around and poured his heart out to Gaster.

\- “Gramps! If we make it out of this alive…” He took a deep breath. Much to Gaster’s surprise he was smiling as tears fell down his cheeks. “You better show up at our wedding…!”


	7. Independence

It was the dawn of a new day. The birds were singing and the residents of Love-De-Gard were hurrying to their jobs.

\- “Good morning!”

The florist Flora smiled sweetly at Chara and asked them politely if they wanted to buy some mulch. Chara gave her a dirty look and folded their arms like a stubborn child.

Much to their dismay, Jane handed over some coins to Flora as she bowed politely. Chara sighed. Japanese girls were always so polite. Jane had thought that Chara’s Japanese was terribly rude and had made it her mission to teach them how to speak properly. So far they hadn’t made much progress, since Chara didn’t really feel like conforming to the gender norms.

Flowey had taken a liking to Flora when they had first arrived in this world. Usually he was embarrassed of the fact that he was a flower but after meeting this beautiful lady he had used it to his full advantage.

\- “Are you jealous?” giggled Jane suddenly.

Chara made a face and shoved their hands into their pockets. It’s not like they were worried about his sudden disappearance or anything. At the very least that was what they were trying to convince themselves.

\- “Maybe you have a brother complex?” suggested Jane playfully.

Chara’s mouth fell open as blood rushed to their face. Jane couldn’t hold it anymore and had a laughing fit.

\- “You’re the one to talk!” yelled Chara.

Still wiping the tears from her eyes, Jane opened the door to the bakery. This time they had made sure to increase their stamina with Gramby’s cookies so they could _finally_ complete the first quest of the game and gain some LOVE.

\- “I was just kidding!”

However, the mood suddenly turned serious when they realized that the baker wasn’t inside of the shop as usual. The air hung heavy as an uncomfortable feeling washed over them. It looked like a tornado had swept by as the bread and the cooking utensils were shattered across the room. Everything was covered in a thin layer of flour. The mess was almost worse than that one time when Chara and Asriel had tried to use the kitchen when his parents weren’t home.

\- “The Hero must have caused this mess while robbing this shop.” concluded Chara. “How disgusting…”

Jane cocked her head which made her oversized hat fall off her head, revealing her true face for a brief second.

\- “Huh? Didn’t we rob the shop in Snowdin?”

Chara threw their arms up in the air. They felt like a child who had just learned how to talk and was struggling to be understood. Chara didn’t like feeling so small. They struggled to formulate an explanation that didn’t just sound like an elaborate excuse.

\- “B-b-but that’s only because _you_ suggested it first…!”

Unfortunately for Chara, their partner had already lost interest in the conversation. She picked up her hat and shook it in an attempt to dust off the flour. Before Chara had the chance to say something or sneeze, a loud crash was heard from the room in the back.

Chara wanted to rush in and investigate but Jane gestured for them to wait. Chara obeyed her reluctantly since they knew that she was smarter than them, even if they hated to admit it. If Jane had been controlling them from the start, maybe they would never have tripped on that vine and fallen into the underground in the first place.

Jane peeked through the keyhole and carefully opened the door when she determined that the coast was clear. Chara let out a sigh of relief since they had just realized that they were both unarmed. The equipment that they had on the moon had mysteriously vanished once they had been transported to Gramby’s cottage.

The decapitated Breadman was lying on the cold hard floor. His sorrowful face was still inside of the toaster while his head from yesterday was discarded on the floor.

Despite the fact that they were normally a picky eater, Chara picked up the poor baker’s former head and bit it hungrily. After Jane had started feeding them food based healing items they had learned to be less picky with their food. This change had surprised Chara since they would always turn up their nose if Toriel put something they didn’t like on their plate. They would never forget that disgusting snail pie. In order to win back their love after this culinary nightmare, Toriel had spoiled them with her desserts made from premium brand chocolate.

\- “The crispy crust of this loaf exceeds the watery texture of the snowman pieces!” said Chara between the bites.

Jane didn’t pay attention to her companion’s questionable choice of breakfast because she had already started to draw some conclusions about the crime scene. Chara knew how much she loved her detective games. For the most part, Chara didn’t share this sentiment because visual novels had too much text for their liking.

There was one detective game that Chara liked though. In this game the killers got executed in a dramatic and humorous fashion. Chara loved it since it always made them laugh. Finally somebody who understood dark humor! Jane always cried when her favorite character died. This was annoying since that ended up happening a lot. Despite her sorrows she kept playing each and every game of the series, even the indie games inspired by it. Chara didn’t understand this perverted sentimentality at all.

\- “The Hero must have gotten scared and left in a hurry when he saw the baker’s decapitated head.” explained Jane finally. “The toast must have looked like a real head from his point of view since the baker was a regular green-haired NPC in the world of the Fake Moon.”

Chara continued awkwardly chewing at their bread as Jane tried to attach the toast that Chara hadn’t consumed yet onto the baker’s neck. Chara couldn’t help but wonder what would happen if there had been no toast left. Would the Breadman die? Would they… level up?

Chara almost choked on some of the bread when their cellphone vibrated in their pocket. While Jane was occupied with helping the baker, they snuck outside and opened their phone in the speed of lightning.

As expected, there was a text from Frisk. However, it was unfinished. For some reason Chara was sweating as they allowed their trembling fingers to dance over the buttons. They knew they needed Frisk’s advice in order to progress but letting them control the body despite the fact that it was rightfully theirs, filled Chara with dread.

_To receive LOVE from Breadman:_

  * _Help Jane clean the bakery_


  * Stop the sale of the regular bread


  * Convince the townspeople to buy the croissants instead



Chara bit their lip. This seemed like a good and logical piece of advice. But there was one thing that still bothered Chara, aside from the fact that they were actually letting Frisk help them out. For a brief moment, Chara even forgot to use their usual flowery language.

\- “We don’t need to go through all that trouble! You’re supposed to automatically gain LOVE by simply talking to the baker in the back room.” explained Chara nervously.

Frisk’s new message hit Chara like a punch in the gut. Their eyes darted across the screen as the text appeared:

_Jane won’t be satisfied until we have cured the Breadman’s amnesia. If we don’t help him, she will think that the LOVE is undeserved and refuse to collect it, thus hindering our progress._

Chara looked down at the half-eaten bread in their hand. Why was it so much more difficult to care about people than eradicate them? And most importantly why did their master have to be so difficult to please? Was it just because her brother was involved?

Frisk sent them one final text message:

_When we get back to our own world, I’m going to ask Jane to bring back Asriel’s old body along with everyone else. I want live in peace with him, Toriel and Sans from now on. I think there should be a way for you to keep playing video games with Jane without having to sacrifice everyone else’s happiness in the process._

_This is my final ultimatum, in exchange for my assistance._

_Yours sincerely,_

_Frisk_

Suddenly, Chara’s heart ached. Flowey had been gone for days. Even though they had never truly considered him to be their brother, Chara couldn’t help but feel worried. Before the incident that would get them both tragically killed, Chara hadn’t felt any kind of brotherly love for Asriel just a strange kind of… affection?

Chara’s fingertips touched the locket around their neck. It felt cold to their touch. They had been so happy the first time they had received one from him at Christmas Eve since they had never had a best friend before.

The problem was that the NPCs celebrated Christmas all year around and were only able to follow the script and predetermined events. When Chara had received their 50th heart locket they had simply thrown the gold-plated plastic garbage in the trash where it belonged. At this point his presents had lost all of their emotional value.

Toriel had yelled at them, while Asriel had tried to hold back his tears. Chara just laughed it off because they knew that things would never change, unless they did something drastic that would shock everyone and change the script, like poisoning the king.

At this point they would have done anything to escape their endless groundhog day, even if that meant sacrificing the NPC who asked them every Friday at exactly 3 pm why they didn’t want to call him “dad”.

During the weekends Asgore would always spawn in the exact same spot in the castle garden without moving a millimeter, enjoying his golden flower tea and a slice of Toriel’s butterscotch pie. Chara knew because they had documented all of the NPCs schedules in a secret diary. That fateful day, the unassuming king’s pie had been secretly swapped by Chara and their unassuming partner-in-crime Asriel.

But for some reason, Chara couldn’t help but feel unease when they read Frisk’s text messages. When did Frisk’s manner of speech begin to resemble their own way of expressing themselves? If Frisk was a playable character, the “MainChara” as the files called them, where did you draw the line between the two of them? Why did it suddenly feel like their roles had been reversed, like they were the one who was scared and confused while Frisk was the one in control of the situation?

And most importantly…

_Was that desire to live happily with Asriel on the surface what they truly wanted somewhere deep, deep down?_

Suddenly Jane interrupted their thoughts. Without realizing it, an hour had already passed. She was wearing a cute maid uniform with a frilly apron. In her hand there was a basket with a huge ribbon that was full of croissants.

Apparently she had already begun executing Frisk’s plan, as the bakery was already cleaned and the croissants gave off the pleasant aroma of freshly baked bread. Had Chara already told her about Frisk’s plan without realizing it? They clutched their head in frustration because nothing made sense anymore. Did they suffer from amnesia when Frisk was in control?

\- “Here you go!”

Chara’s worries were swept away by the mouthwatering sight of piping hot melting chocolate. Jane was offering them half of a croissant to cheer them up. Chara blushed when their stomach growled.

\- “You love chocolate, don’t you?”

Not used to this sudden display of kindness from their master Chara’s eyes suddenly overflowed. They wanted to be loved by somebody who understood their mindset so desperately that it almost hurt. They didn’t even care that this somebody just so happened to be an invisible girl who was practically from another world that Chara would never be able visit, no matter how much they wanted to.

However, this happiness was quickly swapped with embarrassment when their invisible partner held up a pink maid outfit and a pair of cat ears in front of their eyes. _Of course_ , she had an ulterior motive! Chara couldn’t help but groan. They could almost imagine the smug grin plastered on her invisible face.

The embarrassing outfit reminded Chara of the dress that the Mad Mew Mew had worn during their fight when she had poured out their heart to them, regarding her desire to fuse with a more feminine body and win Undyne’s affection. Chara had been so embarrassed by the dummy’s (second!) attempt to make friends with them while insisting that they had some common ground, that they had torn her dress into pieces in a fit of rage and… jealousy?

Chara swallowed hard. Maybe just this one time, it would be fine since they had a “purpose” to wear it. After all Frisk had a female body, so it wasn’t like anybody could judge them too harshly for wearing something like this anyway. But the truth was that the one who judged Chara the hardest was none other than themselves. The hurtful words from the humans they had met in the mountain village had etched themselves into Chara’s young mind, like a virus that was slowing killing them. Before Chara knew it they had repeated those very same words in a desperate attempt to fit in and not be the odd one out.

\- “Don’t be too hard on yourself, OK?” said Jane suddenly as she extended a hand and stroked Chara’s cheek in an almost motherly fashion.

Before Chara got the chance to enjoy the brief physical affection, she got up and dusted off her skirt. She started heading towards the plaza with the basket of croissants in her hand.

\- “If you don’t want to follow, you can go home and rest at Gramby’s until I’m finished handing out these samples. I won’t try to force you to do anything you don’t want to anymore.”

Chara watched her back disappear from their eyesight. They needed some time to process those words. Even if they were able to control themselves, it had always been easier to just go along with what Jane said, like a little duckling following their mother.

Or in this case a self-insert character following their creator. Their older sibling and fellow vessel Kris had always been the bigger and meaner of the two, so there was no contest when Kris had discarded them into the world of Undertale, as they carried out their plan to take over the Deltarune universe. They weren’t stupid; they knew they had to get rid of the competition first before they could set their plan into motion.

As Chara touched the brim of their skirt and decided to finally be honest with themselves, a small heart rose from Chara’s chest. They had gained some LOVE.


	8. No More Worthless Pity

Kris had decided to go to bed early as usual. Toriel worried that they were depressed but when she asked them about it they would always dodge her questions. After coming home from school they would mostly just go to bed immediately and drift off to sleep. A dream landscape that existed somewhere beyond time and space that was both frightening and soothing at the same time.

Ever since _that day_ when Asriel had disappeared in the Dark World, Kris had been overwhelmed by a feeling of helplessness. But nobody knew what they were going through. They weren’t planning on telling anyone either. Ever since they were little Kris had always had trouble socializing with other people. Asriel had been their only companion through thick and thin.

When they were little Asriel and Kris used to play in the empty classroom while waiting for their mother to finish her shift. One day something unexpected happened. The floor suddenly caved in and they were swallowed by the darkness. Kris cried out for their brother and reached for his hand.

When they woke up the small wooden blocks that they were just playing with had transformed. A dark tower that was floating above a fiery pit of lava was now looming over them. The murky lair befitting of a villain cast a shadow over the two siblings as if it was about to swallow them whole. Its many rooms filled with traps and nightmare inducing demons shook Kris’ hollow soul.

Thankfully Asriel had been there to solve the problem. Not only did he have the athletic abilities needed to breeze through all of the obstacles but also the brains to solve the puzzles. When Kris’ legs gave in he carried them all the way up the tower like a knight in shining armor. He didn’t even complain when they wet themselves. But Kris could never forget the humiliation they felt in that very moment.

Kris had never told Asriel about their past. They couldn’t help but wonder if this was all a divine punishment for discarding their younger sibling and fellow vessel Chara. Gaster had made Kris first and then created Chara by copying their DNA.

Since they were essentially a clone Gaster had decided to name them “Christopher” since it sounded almost the same as Kris’ full name just with a different spelling. However, Chara hated having a boy’s name and Kris thought that it was too confusing that they both had the same name so they came up with their current gender neutral nicknames together.

At first the younger vessel would follow Kris around the lab like a lost little puppy. Their world was very small consisting of only a few corridors. Their diet was strict and there were no toys for them to play with.

Eventually they received another sibling who was named Frisk. They were supposed to serve as a backup in case something went horribly wrong in Gaster’s plan. What this plan entailed the vessels did not know, since the old scientist refused to share any further details.

Kris and Chara both felt sorry for their sibling’s miserable existence but Frisk never seemed to care. Unlike the two of them Frisk seemed almost devoid of any personality. They would rarely express themselves or even emote at all. All three of them had empty souls that were waiting for somebody to fill them up with emotions and complicated headcanons.

But their monotonous existence would soon come to change, when Gaster presented them with a red soul of a very young female player. He had managed to connect with her through one of the video game worlds that he had discovered, thanks to his research that revolved around the concept of a multiverse.

However the girl was unaware of Gaster and the vessels. The scientist stressed the importance of things remaining that way. They mustn’t ruin her immersion by making themselves known.

Much to Kris’ surprise Gaster had decided to give the red soul to Chara instead. Apparently the soul was already connected to Chara since she had helped Gaster create Chara’s body. Gaster claimed that he had reached out to the player’s future self and asked her to shape Chara’s mind.

Unfortunately the options were somewhat limited as there was no customization for gender and skin color but the girl had carefully put Chara together limb by limb. Perhaps that was part of the reason why Chara ended up being so enthralled by the feminine and the Japanese culture.

But all of this just sounded very strange to Kris. Why did Gaster need to contact this being from another universe? Kris had many questions but no answers.

Chara would always insist that the moment their master had grabbed that controller was the moment they were born. Their obsession with becoming her “humble servant” creeped out Frisk but made Kris long for the day they would find their own partner that would fill up the empty void in their soul.

After fusing with this soul once and for all, Chara would occasionally be transported to different dimensions that the soul had chosen to visit. Kris was fuming with rage and jealousy whenever Chara would come back and tell them unbelievable stories of all the lives they had lived and all the monsters they had slayed.

This was probably the only time when Frisk would show some level of emotion even if it was hard to catch a glimpse of it. There was just a small hint of disgust around the corners of their mouth whenever Chara spoke of their achievements. Unlike Chara they didn’t think their gruesome victories were something to brag about, much less celebrate.

Sometimes it almost felt like the world revolved around Chara. Kris didn’t want to be trapped in a cage forever. The days that were so similar eventually blended together. They also wanted to visit all these mysterious worlds that Chara had told them about. It just wasn’t fair!

One day Kris’ jealousy got the better of them. When Gaster had temporarily opened up a wormhole to another dimension for research purposes, a dark and sinister desire burned like a black flame in Kris’ empty soul. They would never forget the emotions they felt when they pushed Chara in. It was a mixture of relief, shame and sadistic glee. Finally the talkative one of the bunch had been silenced.

The white corridors would be so much more bearable once the stories of the beautiful wondrous worlds out there disappeared along with Chara. When Gaster noticed that Chara was missing Kris had feigned ignorance. Thankfully it worked and Gaster came to the wrong conclusion that the vessel nicknamed Chara simply had an unfortunate accident and slipped into another dimension.

Gaster eventually took Frisk with him as he went looking for Chara as he was no longer able to locate them. For some reason he had decided to erase Frisk’s memories before leaving. Before they left Gaster decided to get a pair of scissors and cut off both of Frisk’s braids. When he was finished customizing Frisk’s hairstyle, it was a splitting image of Chara’s cute bob. Frisk didn’t protest. They never did. Kris didn’t understand his motives but they had a bad feeling about all of this.

Unfortunately, Gaster and Frisk never returned. The mysterious scientist closed the wormhole before he left, thus trapping Kris inside of the lab. As the resources started to dwindle down to nothing and the loneliness almost drove Kris insane, they decided to try to pry the large red iron door open. Their efforts were in vain and soon Kris would slam their small fists on the door in desperation while crying out in despair.

\- “Somebody! Anybody! Help!!!” yelled Kris until their throat dried up.

On the third day when Kris was almost at their limit, they heard a voice from the other side of the door. It was Asriel who was playing with his friends outside. He was investigating the spooky red door together Bratty, Catty and Burgerpants.

The fluffy monster was convinced that he had heard strange noises coming from the door but his friends just laughed at him for trying to scare them. It turned out that he had been right all along, since his large ears were the only ones capable of picking up on Kris’ muffled screams.

With their combined strengths the four friends managed to pry the large and heavy door open. Kris who was parched and exhausted, fell into Asriel’s arms. In that very moment Asriel’s voice felt like music to their ears.

\- “Hey! Are you… OK?” asked Asriel with his voice full of worry.

Kris smiled faintly before they passed out from exhaustion, knowing that they were safe in his embrace. Since humans weren’t allowed in the monster village, Asriel and his friends carried them to their secret base. Bratty and Catty giggled when Kris ate all of the chocolate bars that they had secretly hidden there. This was before the two girls started fighting over Asriel and stopped being friends. Kris thought that girls were imbeciles.

After Kris had healed up, Asriel would take them on adventures. In order to avoid raising suspicion, Asriel had given Kris a red headband with little devil horns that would somehow help them blend in among the monsters. Kris wondered when their real horns would grow out since that would make things much easier. They thought they were evil enough to grow a pair but Asriel reassured them that this wasn’t true at all.

This summer vacation would become an unforgettable memory for Kris. During the summer they would ride on Asriel’s red bike with the golden basket as they clung onto him for dear life every time he made a sharp turn while laughing. But Kris loved his laugh. They would always go to a secret corner of the beach that only they knew about.

Even with the red devil horns Kris didn’t want anyone else to see them in a bikini. A friendly pink ghost taught them a trick you could do with duct tape that would give them the perfect bikini body but Kris was too paranoid and worried that the tape might fall off while everyone were looking at them.

Kris loved basking in the sun all day until they got a nice honey brown tan. They smirked when they compared the white outline of the bikini to their tan. Chara’s pale butt could never match this. Even if it was silly Kris was proud that there was something about their appearance that made them distinguishable from Chara. In fact they would rather forget about everything that had happened before Asriel had saved them.

Asriel didn’t share their love for sunbathing though. He had passed out in a corner after having a heatstroke because of his warm fur. Kris was fanning him with a palm leaf while giggling at his misery.

Kris was fine with hiding from the rest of the world because Asriel was the only one they needed. He was the person they loved and the only one who accepted them for who they were.

But eventually the summer ended and it got cold outside. Even though Asriel got them a radiator and several blankets, Kris was still freezing. But despite everything Kris insisted on staying at the secret base. One day there was a snowstorm that almost tore the roof of the base. While Kris was in the middle of trying to repair it, Asriel showed up with two monsters who they had never seen before.

Kris wished that they could have met his parents during different circumstances. The sweater that Gaster had knitted for them had a large hole in it which Kris had tried to patch up and their long hair was in a greasy mess.

Unwillingly Kris went with Asriel and his parents to the town’s mayor. Since Asriel was such a model student and a smooth talker she was willing to allow Kris to stay at the Dreamurr’s house. Kris’ dearest friend swore that they didn’t have any violent tendencies that could destroy the community. This made Kris feel guilty since they weren’t sure if this was actually true.

When they arrived at the Dreamurr’s house, Asriel showed Kris to his bedroom. Even though they were both kids at the time and Kris was biologically male they couldn’t help but feel embarrassed by the idea of sleeping with him in his bed. But they didn’t complain since they had nowhere else to go.

Toriel had been nice enough to let them borrow some of her old dresses. To cheer Kris up Asriel put on a fashion show and posed dramatically. They could barely contain their laughter when they tied two gaudy ribbons to his small horns that had just started peeking up.

When they were in the middle of singing like two divas using a shampoo bottle as a microphone, their neighbor Berdly showed up to return a book that he had borrowed from Asriel. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Asriel wearing glittery eye shadow that Kris had helped him apply, awkwardly coughed and put the book down on Asriel’s desk. Without turning around Berdly moonwalked out of the door and slowly shut it.

When the two siblings who had frozen in their poses, heard Berdly close the front door they finally lost it and burst into laughter. They laughed and laughed until tears ran down their cheeks.

The moments they had with Asriel were Kris’ greatest memories. But as they grew older Asriel would prefer the company of his friends. Kris couldn’t help but feel left out.

Asriel would begin to spend more and more time with Bratty. Kris was worried that Asriel would forget about them if he got a girlfriend. Bratty obviously didn’t appreciate their presence and tried to come up with different errands for them like buying a whole bunch of different foods for no reason.

Kris was shocked and hurt by the fact that Asriel never told her off. One day, Kris’ sadistic and jealous side won and they put some buttercups in Bratty’s cake. She got really sick but everyone including Bratty herself jumped to the wrong conclusion that she had just eaten too much.

It was obvious to everyone that Asriel had a huge crush on Bratty. He even rented an art book about dragons so he could impress her with a hand drawn portrait. Even if it was unreasonable Kris was over enjoyed when drawing turned out to be the one thing he actually sucked at.

After he had gifted his crush with a drawing of dragon version of Bratty with lipstick and ridiculous anatomy she had decided to break up with him. Asriel was so heartbroken that he forgot to return the book to the library.

Kris wished that he had drawn a picture of them instead. They would have been happy with it regardless of how it looked. It was the thought that counted after all. But that _self-absorbed bitch_ didn’t seem to agree. Kris couldn’t help but play with the thought of turning her to dust but realized that would probably be illegal.

Berdly would make sure to remind Kris of this incident every time they met since he thought that it was hilarious. But everyone knew that he was just jealous of Asriel. Even though they hated to admit it, sometimes Kris was also jealous of him even though the idea of sinking to Berdly’s level disgusted them.

Eventually Asriel moved away, since he wanted to go to the best college in the big city. The crushing loneliness that Kris had felt after Gaster and Frisk had disappeared without a trace, came creeping up on them once again. To cope with their loneliness they spent most of their free time in the dark world.

They would kill all the enemies. After they finished they would reset and spare all the enemies. There was no meaning in this but for some reason it made Kris feel empowered. After a while their stats rose permanently in the dark world. In the real world they were still pure.

Eventually, Kris started to prefer the escapism of the dark world over the real world. Everyone was so easy to predict in the dark world since they always followed the script which Kris had learned by heart at this point.

When returning home briefly, Asriel had been worried about them. He argued that they needed to stop going to the dark world and instead focus on making real friends. Kris had yelled at Asriel that he could never understand what they were going through and that he had abandoned them.

Without thinking Kris had rushed into the dark world with tears in their eyes. Asriel had called out to them and chased after them. That was when the incident had happened, when Asriel fell into the fountain in the dark world. A monster had ambushed Kris when they weren’t paying attention and Asriel had heroically sacrificed himself to save them.

But once he was suffocating on the dark liquid the façade was broken and he screamed for Kris. He screamed for his mother. He screamed for his father. His screams etched themselves in Kris’ mind and peered over their shoulder like a dark shadow every day. They could never have imagined their next to perfect brother sound so vulnerable.

Kris had been plagued by the guilt ever since. Nobody knew that Asriel hadn’t gone back to the big city since Kris had fabricated a fake story. However, there was still hope to save him. Kris knew what they needed:

_A red soul._

If they fused the red soul with the fountain they would be able to save Asriel. The consequences would be that the real world would slowly be covered in darkness. But Kris didn’t care about the rest of the world.

That was the reason why Kris had been sleeping so much lately. In their dreams they had caught the glimpse of a red soul that seemed to belong to a young boy. If they could only connect with it in the same way that Chara had connected with their partner then there was a chance that Asriel could be saved.

After a hectic adventure in the dark world Kris had finally managed to remove the soul. They knew that the soul wanted to save the world from being covered in darkness. This goal clashed with their own so they had no choice but to imprison the red soul in the cage.

The soul really didn’t seem to like this arrangement. Maybe he had some traumatic experience with being locked up in the past. Even if they were determined to save Asriel, Kris had a knot in their stomach that just got tighter every time the soul slammed against the cage, trying to break free.

That was when they fell down the stairs and ended up in the strange situation they were currently in: a rebellious soul that refused to dodge attacks, Toriel trying to fight them while Sans and a mysterious cat tried to calm her down. Kris knew that they had been cornered but still had the determination to keep going.

While Toriel was distracted they grabbed the cage with the soul inside, stole Toriel’s keys and ran towards the school. When Sans and Toriel finally caught up to them, they had already escaped to their secret dark world.

The boy’s soul resonated with a strange feeling that Kris could not quite comprehend. It was almost as if he was just as isolated as Kris and sympathized with them. But Kris didn’t want any worthless pity.


	9. The Martyr

Chara had almost finished the large sweater for Asgore. They had never been interested in knitting before but after the… _incident_ with the pie Chara knew that they had to do something to apologize for their behavior. When Toriel had beamed at them when they expressed their desire to redeem themselves and partake in one of her favorite hobbies, Chara almost felt guilty. _Almost._

Truth to be told, Chara didn’t feel bad for their cruel actions. Asgore had already returned to his old routine of eating pie in the castle garden and saying the same things over and over again. The only difference was that Chara wasn’t allowed in the kitchen any more. Much to Chara’s dismay Toriel had also hid the knives since they were now deemed unsafe.

This made Chara sad since they wanted to get better at cooking just like the protagonist of their favorite novel. When Toriel who was also an avid reader, wanted to borrow the novel Chara had quickly snatched the small pink book from her and hid it. Even if it was unreasonable Chara didn’t want Toriel to find out that they liked reading novels about transgender characters.

In fact the knives weren’t the only thing that Toriel had hidden from Chara lately. Chara had secretly borrowed her panties since their old ones were getting a bit too small and they were too embarrassed to ask for a new pair. When they opened the drawer and only found socks Chara _knew_ that Toriel had caught them red-handed.

But Toriel never confronted them about this which made Chara feel even worse. It would have been better if she had openly punished them since the shame was slowly consuming them on the inside.

After finishing the sweater Chara wrapped it in paper. They just realized that they had never brought Asgore anything during their many Christmases in the underground. Maybe a new event would occur if they gave a present to everyone in Asriel’s family?

Chara shook their head. Why did they even bother anymore? It’s not like anything revolutionary would happen even if they discovered some new dialogue or got a new item in return.

Chara looked at Asriel who was helping them make a Christmas card for Asgore. He had decided to use macaroni art for some reason. Even though Chara thought that he was being a little bit childish they couldn’t help but smile. He looked so cute when he was furrowing his brows as he carefully placed each pieces of pasta on the glued surface of the card.

That was the moment when something was born inside of Chara: a desire to share their despair with Asriel. What if they told him that they lived in a video game world? What if they told him that his parents were just fictional characters following a script that a human from another universe had written?

Chara felt guilty for even considering this. The agony the felt in every waking moment, knowing that nothing was ever going to change was something Chara wouldn’t wish on their worst enemy.

But Chara was also very lonely and was tired of having to carry this burden all alone. Everything was repetitive and boring nowadays, with the exception of a few trips to other universes which usually involved committing several violent acts.

Chara still hadn’t tried to communicate with their master who kept summoning them since they had recently recalled a memory of Gaster warning them about the dangers of breaking the fourth wall. But the one-way communication almost drove Chara insane especially since most characters they transformed into weren’t even capable of speech.

When their master had decided to play a metafictional war game called “Spec Ops: The Line” where they were actually allowed to break the fourth wall, Chara had almost exploded with excitement. They made sure to bring up everything that had been on their mind all this time during every loading screen. Even if it might have been hypocritical to yell at her about this, Chara felt an immense satisfaction.

Unfortunately, they realized in hindsight that they might have come on too strongly since Jane ended up putting the game down quickly. A game that doesn’t want to be played didn’t bring her any joy. Chara was disappointed even if they could understand this from a logical standpoint. For some reason Chara couldn’t help but worry that they had ruined her fun. Fictional violence for the sake of entertainment was harmless after all.

If a game about a man committing several war crimes and slowly going insane while referencing “Heart of Darkness” by Joseph Conrad could be called entertaining at all. Maybe it was more thought-provoking than anything else. Sometimes at night Chara thought about their life as the man called Martin Walker who killed innocent civilians with white phosphorous. All while looking though a very video-gamey screen before he fired the shots and became god over everyone’s lives.

Chara forcefully pushed these unpleasant thoughts aside. They couldn’t handle this alone anymore. After finally gathering the courage to speak, Chara gently whispered in Asriel’s ear:

\- “Rendezvous with me at the ruins where we had our first encounter. I have an important message to convey to you.” said Chara quietly who was surprised by how calm they sounded even though their heart felt like it was about to explode. “You _must not_ during any circumstances bring company.”

Asriel laughed awkwardly and scratched his head.

\- “When you say it like that, it almost sounds like a threat…”

But Chara’s face was dead serious. The rest of the day passed as they continued to work in silence on the Christmas decorations. Even though Chara wouldn’t say it out loud they missed his idle chatter even if they usually only listened with half an ear.

It was snowing in Snowdin and Asgore and Rudy were busy handing out the presents to the monster children. Asriel didn’t want to ruin the magic by calling out to Santa Claus and expose his true identity so he quietly snuck the presents underneath the tree. Sometimes Asriel missed being like these kids who still believed in fairy tales.

Chara had already gone ahead without him since they said they needed to “mentally prepare” themselves. Asriel had no idea what they meant by that. Even though he liked them, he didn’t understand why they always had to be so serious about every little thing. A small snowflake fell on his nose, causing him to sneeze.

\- “They should really try to lighten up a little…” mumbled Asriel as his hot breath formed a small cloud in the cold winter air.

Asriel couldn’t stop worrying as he entered the ruins and carefully avoided all of the traps. Toriel had placed them there to prevent any human intruders from reaching the city and killing the monsters. Asriel was glad that he had found Chara first and helped them get past all these anti-human defense systems.

But he had never understood the spike trap, wouldn’t the humans just swim past it? It’s not like the waters were infested by piranhas or anything. Asriel hoped that this wasn’t a sign that his old lady was starting to develop dementia.

He didn’t understand why the other monsters fantasized about the destruction of humanity. It almost seemed a little racist to judge 8 billion people just because a small group of humans had sealed them after the war. Especially since locking them up in the underground wasn’t even a violent act to begin with, it just resulted in more segregation which most of the monsters seemed to desire anyway.

Asriel had always been different though. One time he even wrote a story where a human princess and a monster prince fell in love. At the end of the story the prince transformed into a human and they lived happily ever after on the surface.

He had always dreamed of the surface world and one day befriending a human. Even though Chara was a stranger when they had first met he had wanted to prove everyone wrong by befriending them.

Some of the monsters made fun of him and accused him of having a “human fetish”. Asriel hated to admit it but maybe they were right. If Chara had been an injured monster he would still have helped them but probably not let them stay at his room in the castle.

Asriel finally arrived at the meeting place. In the distance he could see that Chara was wearing a cute winter dress coat and a red satin bow in their hair. They were standing underneath the large hole where some of the snow had blown in.

In the light Asriel saw thousands of snowflakes dance in the air, as Chara stood there with their eyes closed and their mouth open. They were so busy trying to catch the snowflakes on the tip of their tongue that they didn’t notice that Asriel had arrived.

Asriel wished that he had brought the camera with him. It was refreshing and honestly kind of cute to see them act like a child for once. He tried to come up with a joke to lighten up the mood.

\- “Hahaha, what did you want to talk to me about? Were you planning on confessing your undying love for your best bro?” joked Asriel.

Chara finally noticed him and jumped in surprise. Asriel burst out laughing. Chara tried to act offended but soon they were laughing too. When they had both settled down they laid down in the snow and started making snow angels as they stared at the roof of the cave above them.

\- “The surface is so close yet so far away…” whispered Chara softly.

Asriel rolled over in the snow. He wondered if Chara was cold since they were only wearing thin stockings. They were probably freezing their butt off. For a brief second he wondered if he should give them his jacket but maybe that would be too romantic and just make things awkward. Why did feminine presenting people wear so little clothing during the winter?

\- “Do you ever miss home?” asked Asriel without thinking.

Chara rolled over and met his gaze. Asriel was about to apologize but was interrupted by Chara.

\- “Where is _home_ ”? asked Chara quietly.

Slowly Chara sat up in the snow. Their ribbon was loose after playing in the snow and looked like it was about to fall off. Asriel got up and tried to fix it.

\- “Don’t you like your new home? Why did you dislike the humans from the village?” asked Asriel who had one million questions but received no satisfying answers from Chara.

Chara looked at their fingers. They were blue since they had forgotten their mittens at home… no, at the castle! Asriel who didn’t need mittens because of his warm winter fur tried to rub Chara’s fingers to get their blood circulation going.

Suddenly Chara leaned towards Asriel’s face. For a brief moment he thought that they were going to rob him of his first kiss (he wasn’t ready yet!) and shut his eyes tightly but then they whispered something in his ear.

\- “Can you keep a secret?”

Embarrassed by his own weird imagination, Asriel blushed and answered without thinking. He had no idea that what was about to be unveiled was going to shatter his entire perception of reality.

\- “O-o-of course! We are best friends after all!”

Asriel started rummaging through the pocket of his jacket. He was looking for the small present with the heart locket that he was planning on giving to Chara. He was originally going to save it for Christmas but now seemed like the perfect moment to hand it over. Unfortunately he had forgotten the present at home.

\- “Were you looking for this?” said Chara flatly and held up the original heart locket they had received from him.

Asriel stared in disbelief at the locket in Chara’s hand. The golden locket glittered in the light cast from the surface and the music box inside was playing the same lullaby that his mother used to sing to him when he was little. There was no way this locket was a counterfeit.

Asriel collapsed, causing the powder snow to dance up in the air. Suddenly his legs wouldn’t carry him anymore and his head felt like it was about to explode. It was like a computer that had just caught an error or a virus.

_Information overload. File could not be read._

Chara kneeled down and hugged him gently. Just like back when they had first met Chara helped Asriel to stand up as he clutched his head. Now the roles were reversed as Chara carried their best friend to Toriel’s old cottage in the ruins.

When they arrived in Asriel’s old childhood room Chara opened the drawer. They had secretly stolen the key to it and hid all of the heart lockets he had given to them inside of the drawer. They knew that their secret would be safe in here since nobody used this room anymore. Asriel’s eyes grew wide as Chara winded up each locket, creating a chaotic melody as every music box played at the same time.

\- “This isn’t possible! The locket was custom made. Dad gave one to mom when he purposed to her just like the tradition says…” rambled Asriel not realizing that he had just confessed his true feelings for Chara.

However, Chara was too distracted to worry about Asriel’s contradictory feelings towards his best friend that everybody in the underground referred to as his younger sibling. Instead they grabbed his hand gently and lead him outside. They walked in silence until they reached Snowdin.

In the distance they spotted Asgore and Rudy who had just finished handing out presents. The king had gotten sweaty and taken off his Santa Claus beard which he wore over his actual beard. Asriel remembered how Chara had borrowed it because they wanted to know what it was like to have a beard without actually growing one. Toriel had thought that it was adorable to see the kids chase after each other with water guns while wearing nothing but matching cowboy hats and Santa Claus beards. For once the two of them actually looked like “brothers”.

Chara’s whisper woke up Asriel from his thoughts:

\- “Now Rudy is going to suggest they crack open a cold one at the bar.”

Just like Chara had predicted Rudy approached Asgore and threw one arm over his shoulder in a brotherly fashion. The pair headed inside the bar together as Asriel stared at Chara in disbelief. Chara gave him a mysterious smile and playfully grabbed his hand once again.

They snuck inside the bar and hid under a table. Two fish monsters were making out above them. Chara giggled and Asriel made a face. Then Chara pointed at Asgore who was sitting at the counter.

\- “Now they will order two shots of vodka. Then Asgore is going to lean against him and…”

Asriel watched with big eyes as his father did exactly what Chara had said. He covered his mouth to prevent himself from making any noise. Then tears formed in his eyes. But much to Chara’s surprise Asriel didn’t seem shocked.

\- “I knew it…” he whispered under his breath.

Chara who had already gotten bored with the familiar scene they had already discovered over a year ago which always played out the exact same way, started playing with one of Asriel’s ears. Chara let out a huge yawn and burrowed their nose in his fur which was soft as a feathery pillow. They could almost fall asleep right there, in that position.

They whispered the tale of the sad king in the prince’s ear:

\- “Asgore has a schedule that he follows every week.

On Monday he has a court meeting about the future of the underground.

On Tuesday he waters the flowers while humming to himself.

On Wednesday he eats a slice of his favorite butterscotch pie in the castle garden.

On Thursday he holds a speech to the public and lies about the current overpopulation to calm the masses.

On Friday he hands out Christmas presents to the monster children together with his Rudolph and cheats on his wife.

On Saturday Toriel confronts him after Asriel goes to bed because somebody saw him at the bar. He denies that anything romantic happened.

On Sunday he avoids Toriel the entire day and asks Asriel to go with him on a father and son skiing trip to Snowdin. When Asriel decides to go figure skating with his friends Noelle and Suzy instead of hanging out with his embarrassing father, the couple heads to the cabin.”

Chara finished their rant. Another person would have been out of breath but Chara spoke very slowly in a sleepy but oddly soothing voice. Asriel’s throat was dry. Not because his father had cheated on his mother but because of something much, much scarier. When Asriel spoke his voice was barely a whisper:

\- “What happens the next week on Monday…?”

Chara jumped up on Asriel’s back to avoid getting slapped in the face by the tail of the mermaid monster at the table above them. Thankfully, Chara was half his size so they weren’t too heavy. The two fishes were quite the odd couple since the mermaid’s facial features were almost humanoid while her husband had the face of a fish but also two legs.

Chara knew that the monsters at the table were both royal guards and had a young daughter named Undyne. Every Sunday they went skiing in Snowdin and would always narrowly escape an avalanche.

Chara wondered if they should warn them about the imminent threat since there was no guarantee they would make it out alive the next week but they decided that it was much more interesting to let fate decide. Even if that would make Undyne an orphan but Chara thought that would at least make for an interesting backstory. It was the kind of heart wrenching story that would give their sentimental master the “feels”.

Chara didn’t know at the time but after Undyne’s parents passed away in the accident Asgore who had just lost his own child, took her under his wing and trained her to be a royal guard just like her late parents. That was the birth of the heroine who would become Chara’s greatest opponent. Aside from that stupid skeleton but Chara thought that it sounded cooler to pretend that it was Undyne who was the final boss.

Since Chara didn’t answer his question, Asriel once again repeated it. They had almost forgotten about him and drifted off to sleep. He was softer than their bed at home. Chara took a deep breath and finally revealed the truth.

\- “On Monday everything starts all over again. It’s always the same.”

Asriel and Chara laid under the table in silence until all of the guests had left. Grillby lifted the cloth of the table and told the kids that playtime was over and it was time to go home. He gave Asriel an odd look. It almost seemed like the kid had aged 10 years overnight. That was when he lost his childhood innocence.

Asriel carried the now sleeping Chara to Toriel’s old cottage. Right now he couldn’t face his parents. He laid them down gently on Toriel’s old bed and curled up next to them. He stared at the ceiling as he listened to Chara’s light snores. All of a sudden Asriel felt alone and lost. The only people in the world who were capable of independent thought were him and Chara. Asriel felt Chara move next to him. Since they seemed to be awake he decided to start asking the questions that were burning in his mind.

\- “How did you find out the truth?”

Chara nuzzled his ear. Maybe telling him about Gaster, the other vessels, their mysterious master, the multiverse and their shapeshifting abilities was a little too much for the time being. Telling his parents or any other monster was also out of question since that might break the game and cause horrifying glitches.

\- “I have always known. Ever since _she_ created my form and shaped my mind.” yawned Chara.

Asriel furrowed his brows. He might have been kindhearted and naïve but he wasn’t entirely stupid.

\- “Did you poison my father just to see what would happen? Is that why you just laughed it off? Did you just feel apathy towards him because you had already documented all of his events in your diary?”

Chara looked him dead in the eye. No use denying it anymore.

\- "Do you hate me, Asriel?”

To Chara’s surprise Asriel embraced them. He burrowed his nose in their hair.

\- “I could never hate you. Even if I tried…” he sobbed. “You have been alone all this time, haven’t you? Even when other people were around you were still all alone...”

Chara shifted uncomfortably since they weren’t sure what to do in this situation. Managing relationships was much harder in “real life” compared to video games where the characters always followed a strict schedule and a script.

But Chara knew that they had brought this upon themselves. They felt many conflicting emotions but were also intrigued by a future with somebody else who knew the truth about the repetitive nature of the world they lived in.

That was the moment _the plan_ started taking shape in Chara’s mind. They had tried to deny it but their loneliness wasn’t the only reason they had told Asriel the truth. They wanted power and control.

Chara had originally wanted to assassinate the king since that would make Asriel inherit the crown. If they then managed to convince him to fuse with them, then Chara would be able to rule the underground alongside Asriel. They would also be able to cross the barrier and conquer more land.

Chara knew that breaking the barrier through violent means would most likely result in another war with the humans. Since humans were stronger than monsters it was important to level up Asriel’s stats before the war begun.

Chara planned to grind EXP from the humans at the village since they had already seen all the events there and exhausted all of the dialogue options. They also knew each villager's schedule by heart so it would be easy to begin in the morning just before dawn by luring the humans out to the town’s square with their own corpse as a decoy.

Chara weren’t planning on absorbing any of the human souls in the village since they still hated these people who had mistreated them and discriminated against them. After all, they had to choose carefully which souls to absorb since they would be stuck with them for a long time maybe even for all eternity since Asriel wouldn’t age since he had no children.

Chara wasn’t thrilled by the idea of sharing Asriel with anyone else. Maybe they could take a human from the village hostage and push them in the hole so a boss monster like Asgore could absorb their soul. Then Asgore could come over to the other side, kill six humans and break the barrier. Unlike Toriel the king seemed to have figured out their secret plan already when he told Chara to stay determined on their deathbed. He couldn't keep lying about the overpopulation forever after all. Chara knew that if it wasn't for Asriel he would probably have killed them long ago. The king had even told Chara that they reminded him of his old human friend who had suggested that he should be sealed after the war instead of being executed. Asgore must have confused Chara with them when he said that they had "hope" in their eyes. Chara wondered if this human was also a vessel created by Gaster.

However, Chara never told Asriel about this plan since they knew he would just chicken out, even after finding out the truth about the video game world they lived in. But wasn’t it better to take the chance to see something new even if it meant risking it all, than doing nothing? It was better to regret doing it rather than regret not doing anything at all even when they had the chance to.

Even though the world and the video game character that inhabited it were just as boring and repetitive to Asriel as they were to Chara, he _still_ had to play the hero. Not just once but twice. Asriel was doomed to suffer for all eternity as a soulless flower when the others lived happily ever after on the surface.

Unlike Flowey, Chara had no intention of becoming a martyr. That was why they decided to end it all by erasing the world once and for all, even when they got a chance to redeem themselves in the Soulless Pacifist run.

Like a child who was proud of their turd, they had made a picture for their master to show how many enemies they had eradicated and how strong they had become. After training hard, they had even managed to defeat the superbosses Undyne and Sans without any assistance! Unfortunately for Chara their gift wasn’t appreciated... They didn’t understand why though since Jane usually liked collecting achievements.

But lately Chara was starting to doubt their own narrative. Maybe there was another way after all. Chara suddenly wanted to believe that there was a way to avoid either becoming a martyr like Flowey or killing everybody else.

But their fate all depended on one single girl who was not a fictional character but the only _real_ person in this story. She was the one person who could never bore Chara but would also never see them as an equal no matter what.

Chara didn’t know that it was possible to love and hate somebody so much at the same time.


	10. Fragile Little Flower

When Chara first woke up in the village they were so confused. Kris had pushed them through the wormhole, hadn’t they? Chara had noticed their jealous gazes but never thought that they would stoop that low.

At first, Chara had been excited despite the fact that they were in the middle of nowhere. They had been imprisoned by the sterile white walls of the claustrophobic lab for way too long. It was _so_ nice to be able to move around freely in their own body. It almost felt weird to be outside and be able to walk anywhere they wanted to.

Chara took a deep breath and inhaled the fresh mountain air and the smell of nature. Spring had arrived and through the small patches of snow, Chara could see some flowers peek up. Chara who was secretly a little bit of a hopeless romantic, couldn’t help but think that this was a sign of a new beginning.

However, it was harder than they had thought to control the body without their master’s assistance. When Chara finally arrived at a mountain village, some of the human children stared at them when they staggered past them.

\- “Who is that? Why do they walk like they have a limp?” whispered one kid a little too loudly.

Another kid picked his nose and snorted. He was fat and was wearing suspenders and a cap with a propeller on it. Chara cringed at his fashion sense.

\- “Is that a boy or a girl?” he yelled without a care in the world.

Chara sighed and made a face. They were off to a rough start. The kids concluded that Chara must be a girl since they had long hair.

\- “If only it was that easy…” mumbled Chara quietly to themselves.

There was a part of Chara that secretly felt euphoria that they passed as a girl to these strangers. But at the same time, it also felt weird that these people, who they had never even talked to before, believed that they had the right to put a label on them like that without even asking.

Chara arrived at a cozy wooden cottage. Smoke came out of the chimney and Chara could smell smoked ham. Chara had an internal debate whether they should enter the cottage and beg for food. Then their stomach made a loud noise, much to their embarrassment. Chara decided that it was worth a try.

_What was the worst that could happen?_

Looking back at it now, Chara couldn’t believe how naïve they had been. In hindsight it would probably have been better if they had never stepped through that door. But in their own defense, Chara had never been outside of the lab before and didn’t know how NPCs acted.

And by that Chara didn’t just mean the limited dialogue. Of course, that sucked too and almost drove Chara insane but that wasn’t the biggest problem. The issue was that these people didn’t like _people like Chara_ at all.

Chara had just stepped right into a Christian camp for children. They quickly realized that any discussions about any genders outside of the binary, the multiverse or the idea of the whole world being a video game were strictly prohibited. One of the adults had even accused them of being possessed by a demon and forced them to do an exorcism. This just made Chara roll their eyes.

Despite all of that Chara tried their best to fit in. Every day at lunch a lady would hand out some bread, a bowl of soup and a carton of fruit juice. Chara’s hunger was stronger than their pride. The only thing that made their situation somewhat bearable was the small piece of dark chocolate they got as a dessert during the weekends.

While eating alone in the cafeteria, Chara wondered what Frisk and Kris would have said and done if they had been in this situation with them. Kris would probably have wanted some more of that “sick” fruit juice. Frisk had always been a health freak so they would have refused to eat the white bread and criticized the lack of vegetables in their diet. Chara shook their head. It’s not like they missed them or anything, they told themselves.

Chara didn’t make any friends. Everyone thought that they were just weird and creepy. It wasn’t long until the bullying started. One day while Chara was picking flowers at the park in the town’s square, a group of kids came up to them. They were all alone as usual, so the kids took advantage of the situation. The same tired old question escaped one of the older boy’s lips:

\- “You are actually a guy, aren’t you? You’ve been lying to us this whole time!” he exclaimed and pointed angrily at Chara.

At this point Chara’s hair had gotten quite long and was reaching down to their hip. It had finally gotten warmer outside and the small patches of snow had started to melt. To celebrate the arrival of spring after a long winter, Chara had decided to wear a purple checkered dress today. They had tried to get their bangs which were getting a bit too long, out of their face with a cute flower hairpin.

Even if Chara didn’t fully identify as a girl, they had decided to pose as one for the time being. It seemed easier to do that until they figured out what to do next. At least the food was free even if the bread was a little dry and the soup was usually lukewarm with some sad vegetables swimming around in it.

However, this peace would soon be destroyed by the hand of a bored and curious kid. Thinking back at it now, maybe Flowey had been right, Chara shouldn’t have used boredom and curiosity as an excuse for their horrible actions. After all, they knew by experience how much it hurt to be treated like a plaything.

Before Chara had the chance to react, one of the bigger boys grabbed them from behind. Chara’s eyes grew wide and blood rushed to their face as the kids lifted up the hem of their dress and pulled down their panties without their consent. Suddenly Chara’s naked buttocks were on display for the whole village to see.

Thankfully the kids didn’t have any ulterior motive aside from gawking at the non-binary kid’s _secret penis_. But Chara could never forget the humiliation they felt in that very moment, even after they kicked these kids’ sorry asses until they begged for mercy. Unfortunately for Chara, this only gave them the reputation of being a violent thug.

This wasn’t the end of it though. One day, one of the caretakers called Chara in. She told them to sit on a chair in front of a mirror. They had forced Chara to tell them their “real” name and dress “appropriately” if they wanted another helping of that disgusting soup. Now everyone referred to them with male pronouns and by the name _Christopher._ Apparently the adults had taken the bullies’ side.

\- “Don’t you think it’s time to get a haircut, _Christopher?_ ”

Chara cringed at the sound of their dead name. They looked in the mirror. Who was this _boy_ with baggy clothes and messy long hair that they saw in their reflection?

But _Chris_ had tried _his_ best to fit in. After all, there was no other way. _His_ survival depended on this, _he_ told _himself._ _Chris_ tried to puff up _his_ chest and imitate one of the burly male heroes from one of the video games _he_ had played with _his_ master. _Chris_ hoped that _his_ master wasn’t a girl because taking orders from a woman would be pathetic and unmanly.

\- “I don’t want to look like a fucking fag. Just chop it all off!” said _Chris_ in _his_ burliest voice before _he…_ they had the chance to regret this statement.

Chara didn’t remember what happened next. The caretaker probably said something about their coarse language, they weren’t listening. They shut their eyes tightly as they felt the scissors brush lightly against their ears.

\- “W-w-wait! You’re going to cut it _that_ short!?” yelled Chara in a meek and high-pitched voice but it was already too late.

Their beautiful long hair was just a pile on the floor now. The caretaker had cut Chara’s hair so short that it was basically a pixie haircut. Even if Chara tried to hold back, the tears just overflowed. Without a word, Chara darted out of the room. They knew that they couldn’t keep up this charade anymore.

At night when everyone had fallen asleep, Chara got the biggest backpack that they could find. It was tempting to just throw a childish tantrum and put the house on fire while the others were sleeping. But Chara was smarter than that and realized that they had to come up with a plan if they wanted to survive out in the wilderness.

Careful not to make any noise, Chara opened up the kitchen cabinet and stole some canned food that wouldn’t expire anytime soon. They also grabbed a tent, some warm clothes, a sleeping bag, a pot, a lighter and a flashlight. Chara smirked when they slipped a bar of chocolate into their pocket. They would need some energy on the long hike.

Before they left Chara passed by a mirror. They noticed that their short hair was greasy and realized they should probably get some refreshments too. They snuck into the bathroom and picked up a hairbrush, some shampoo and a bar of soap.

They felt a little bit adventurous today and decided to steal some make-up while they were at it. Not knowing what they were doing, Chara applied a lot of rouge on their already rosy cheeks. As a finish, they applied some glittery lip gloss on their chapped lips. Chara put their old flower hairpin in their now short hair. The end result left much to be desired but for some reason Chara was happier than they had been in a long time.

Chara realized that their backpack had gotten quite heavy and the sun was rising. It was probably best to leave as soon as possible, before the others woke up. Chara left a note in the kitchen that said that their parents had come to pick them up early in the morning because they were going on a trip abroad and would miss the plane otherwise. Of course, this was just a lie to avoid unnecessary attention. It would be troublesome if anyone thought that they were suicidal or called the police.

Even if it was tempting to tell them the truth, that they had been deeply hurt by their actions and sometimes even thought about punishing themselves. However, Chara had come up with a strategy to avoid any thoughts of self-harm by snapping their wrist with a rubber band or splashing their face with water instead of doing something that would leave a permanent mark on their body.

Chara was too vain to want a scar on their body, even if some video game protagonists made it look badass. Besides, there were no video games where losing health points were a positive thing anyway.

Chara began their long journey towards Mount Ebott. They had heard that travelers who climbed the mountain never returned. It reminded Chara of a game they had played once with their master which was about a transgender girl who wanted to challenge herself by climbing a mountain. Even if it wasn’t a fighting game Chara thought that it was a refreshing experience. Maybe they would have an epic battle with their evil self at the top!

\- “Yeah, right! Fat chance, Chara. There was never any good in you to begin with…” muttered Chara quietly to themselves.

A couple of hikers passed by and gave Chara an odd look. To avoid raising suspicion they tried to flash them a smile but it just looked forced.

\- “Hey, missy! This is the road to Mount Ebott. Are you sure you want to continue?” asked one of the hikers while stroking his beard.

Chara smirked. They nodded their head.

\- “I’m on a journey of self-enlightenment.” said Chara because at least that was only a half lie. “And don’t call me “missy”. That is embarrassing.”

Suddenly the hikers seemed relieved. The hiker gave Chara a hearty laugh and slapped his round stomach. The other hiker tipped his hat to Chara. Their sudden change of attitude annoyed Chara.

\- “Best wishes, young lad!” laughed both of the hikers.

Chara rolled their eyes but kept walking. For a brief moment, they thought about ignoring the hikers’ comments but they couldn’t contain themselves. When the hikers were almost out of sight Chara turned around and yelled at them.

\- “Thanks!” yelled Chara as loudly as they could. “By the way, I’m not a boy!”

The confused hikers looked at each other. Chara giggled as the phrase “I’m not a boy” echoed across the canyon. Suddenly Chara was full of energy and ran all the way up the mountain.

Before they knew it, they had arrived at the top. Much to Chara’s disappointment nothing amazing happened, no evil final boss awaited. Chara was exhausted and collapsed on the ground.

At least the view was nice. There was a waterfall nearby so Chara pulled out their mug and filled it with fresh water. They allowed themselves to eat a small piece of chocolate as a reward for their hard work.

Before they got too tired Chara put up their tent and started boiling some canned beans in a pot for dinner. Thankfully, their red human soul had the ability to turn into knife as well. It was powerful enough to cut trees with just a few slices. It made gathering firewood much easier.

The dinner wasn’t the greatest culinary experience but Chara was starving. Tomorrow they would try to catch some fish. Thankfully, they had remembered to steal a fishing rod from the cottage while they were at it.

The sun was setting and Chara decided that it was time for a bath. Since nobody else was around Chara stripped naked and jumped into the water. It was a little cold but Chara enjoyed soaking in the water until they got wrinkled finger tips.

Before they knew it, the darkness had arrived. Chara got up from the water, wrapped a towel around their wet hair and put on their pajamas. Worried that they might start a forest fire, Chara put out the campfire with some water and slipped into their sleeping bag.

Unable to sleep, Chara suddenly felt bored. Maybe they should have stolen a Gameboy or a book before they left. But then again, maybe that would be too meta, playing a video game inside of a video game?

Before Chara had time to finish this thought, their red soul transported them to a snowy mountain in a video game. Madeline, the protagonist from the mountain climbing video game had fused with her evil self and finally achieved personal growth as she arrived at the top of the mountain. Chara knew that this wasn’t real because it was all just a video game but _she_ still enjoyed the breeze playing with _her_ long shiny pink hair as _she_ admired the view.

When Chara woke up, they honestly felt disappointed that it was over. After all, video games were their only source of entertainment right now. Chara hoped that their master would play with them again. They didn’t collect all the strawberries after all. Chara had to push away the thoughts of that delicious and mouthwatering strawberry pie from the ending credits and get off their butt and start gathering food.

Soon, Chara’s life as a mountain hermit became their new “normal”.

Some days Chara got lucky and caught some fish.

Another day Chara got sick after eating some strange mushrooms they had found on the mountains.

A few days later Chara killed a rabbit with their knife and skinned it alive.

A few weeks later Chara got a stomachache since all the canned beans had made them gassy.

A month later when Chara was sad and wanted some comfort food, they realized that they had eaten all three chocolate bars that they had stolen and started crying hysterically.

After having a small mental breakdown, Chara decided to leave the tent for a while and take a walk to clear their head. They had just finished setting up a net to catch some more fish. Suddenly Chara felt lonely and wondered what Frisk and Kris were doing.

Was Gaster worried about them? What happened to the secret plan which was the reason he had created them in the first place? Had Frisk started talking more? Did Kris… regret their actions?

What about the golden strawberries from the mountain climbing video game? They didn’t get all of the strawberries! As embarrassing as it was, this was the one thing that bothered them the most. Chara was starting to wonder if they were beginning to lose their grip on reality. But at the same time these meaningless tasks also filled Chara with a sense of… comfort?

Suddenly Chara wondered what their purpose was aside from pleasing their master. What was the point of just staying alive? Was there more to life than just focusing on what to eat the next day?

Chara felt a cold raindrop collide with their nose. While Chara was lost in their thoughts, a storm had brewed up and Chara could hear thunder in the distance. They were too far away from the tent so they decided to take shelter from the rain in a nearby cave.

Chara pulled a hand through their damp hair. It had finally started to grow out again and was now reaching down to their ears. Chara wasn’t sure if they wanted long hair anymore. Maybe they could try shoulder length hair like Kris’. Chara giggled when they remembered how they used to braid Kris’ hair while Frisk decorated it with one thousand colorful hair clips.

The rain was still pouring down and Chara could even see some hail. They sighed and got up from the rock they were sitting on. At least they could try to explore the cave and see if they could find something to eat.

Unfortunately, Chara only found some moss growing on the wall. They had too much pride to eat it even if their stomach was rumbling. Besides they would probably just get an upset stomach again.

Despite their bad luck when it came to finding food, Chara couldn’t help but be impressed by how large this cave was. Chara noticed a large hole at the end of the cave and went up closer to investigate. They saw light shining through the hole and heard some high pitched noises that didn’t sound entirely human.

That was the moment when Chara saw _him._

At first Chara was confused. They recognized the signature white fur and long ears almost instantly. But why would a Mimiga from the Cave Story universe live in a hole in the ground? Was there a secret society down there? Had the two universes collided?

At least the Mimiga didn’t seem rabid. Was there a hint of red in its eyes? Chara leaned closer to get a better look, careful not to get noticed by it. Thankfully, it was occupied with picking yellow flowers, possibly for consumption. After all, yellow flowers were the only thing the Mimigas could eat.

Chara had all of the Cave Story lore memorized so they felt confident with this thesis at the time. That was part of the reason why Chara had been so amused by Asgore’s sickness because it was ironic that the only thing he should logically be able to eat, could actually kill him.

Chara didn’t notice the vine when they stepped closer to get a better look. When the “Mimiga” finally looked up and met Chara’s gaze it let out a very unmanly and high-pitched scream. This startled Chara so much that they panicked and tripped on the aforementioned vine.

When Chara collided with the ground they hit their head so hard that it caused a fracture. Thankfully, their red soul had somehow managed to escape their chest. However, Chara’s wound caused them to temporarily lose their memories.

Asriel narrowly managed to catch the red soul before it hit the ground and shattered. He jumped in surprise when he saw Chara’s empty vessel. Chara’s eyes were lifeless and their whole body had turned gray. Black blood poured out of their head.

Asriel noticed that there was a heart-shaped hole in their chest. Even though he was slightly embarrassed, he lifted up their shirt gently to get a better look. Then he realized that the human was male and felt a little bit silly. He wondered why the human was wearing a pink sports bra when it didn’t have any breasts.

Asriel debated for a brief moment if he should ask an adult if reviving the human was really a good idea but then he noticed that they had already lost a lot of blood. He was worried that they would expire if he left them there and didn’t want to take the risk. After all, he didn’t even know this person; they might have been a good human.

With his heart beating out of his chest, Asriel inserted the red soul in the heart-shaped hole in Chara’s chest and begun performing CPR. As if by magic, Chara started coughing and suddenly their colors returned. Asriel noticed that their sweater had changed color from grey to blue and orange. Asriel didn’t know about this, but Gaster had made that sweater out of magical yarn so the red soul could choose her favorite color.

After making sure the human was alright, Asriel introduced himself as the prince of the Underground. When he asked Chara for their name, they debated for a brief moment before they told him their nickname. Since he seemed nice, Chara considered asking him to refer to them by gender neutral pronouns but decided against it for the time being.

Chara didn’t remember how they had arrived at the castle; they must have passed out on the way there. When they woke up, Asriel was carrying them like a princess and was tucking them into bed. He made sure to get some bandage and treat Chara’s wound. Chara was too weak to protest.

It was weird lying down on a soft bed after getting used to sleeping outside in a tent. But Chara’s time with Asriel and his family were some of their happiest memories. At least, until their old memories came rushing back and Chara once again got transported to other dimensions by their faceless master.

Chara woke up in a bed next to Jane. After feeling disoriented for a while, Chara realized that they must have had a dream about their past.

Chara looked around the room. They remembered how they had just been casually given a new house after the previous owner; Nikka had left after saying something vague about his “partner” becoming a pervert. Chara assumed that he was talking about the guy who was tied up outside on the porch. Chara didn’t kink shame but they couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable with the idea of a guy exploring his twisted sexual fantasies outside of two girls’ house.

Or well, girls and girls… Chara still hadn’t decided what gender they identified as, even if they were currently using Frisk’s female body. For a brief moment, Chara wondered if it was hypocritical to judge the pervert outside when they were using somebody else’s body without their consent.

But it wasn’t like they had a perverted reason for doing that! They weren’t like the Hero who broke into people’s homes while they were sleeping and stole their underwear. It wasn’t like they had wanted to wear Toriel’s old bloomers; they had just been desperate back then. In fact, they had even thought that it was a little bit unhygienic. They would rather have bought a pair of panties of their own choice if they only had the courage to.

Before Chara could finish this strange line of thoughts, they spotted Flowey. He was in the middle of untying the pervert called Pokka. For some reason, Chara decided to hide. They weren’t sure why, they were just embarrassed for some reason. Maybe they had their fair share of fantasies outside of the norm too, which made it hard to look at the technically harmless pervert.

Chara felt uncomfortable. There was a thin line between consensual masochism and self-harm. Suddenly Chara recalled the memory of themselves in bed, begging Asriel to feed them with more buttercups. The taste of pain made the guilt in the back of their mind, just a little bit more bearable. Chara knew that it was wrong to force their sadomasochism onto Asriel who had been deeply traumatized by their suffering.

Suddenly, the pervert spoke up. His voice sounded raspy as if he desperately needed some water. Even though the rope had left marks on his body and he had soiled his pants, the man didn’t celebrate his freedom.

\- “Nikka promised me that he would come back…” whispered Pokka. “He always comes back eventually.”

Flowey gave him an angry look. He didn’t care that the entire Midnight University was now staring at them. Yoshida coughed awkwardly.

\- “Don’t you realize that he just wanted to get rid of you!?” yelled Flowey all of a sudden. “It doesn’t matter how loyal you are to him, to him you are nothing more than a disgusting weed growing in his garden!”

Chara felt a knot in their stomach. They started fidgeting with their knife, the one that was perfect for cutting weeds. They had never felt this feeling before. Was this a result of all the LOVE they had received in this world?

Surprisingly, Yoshida had jumped down from where he was sitting and approached Flowey. He had a sympathetic look in his eyes. Chara had no idea that a wind-up bird toy could look so sad.

\- “Are you perhaps, by any chance projecting?” chirped Yoshida finally after an awkward silence.

Pokka looked unsure for a second, before he started walking away slowly.

\- “T-thanks for rescuing me…” mumbled Pokka under his breath.

He waved awkwardly at Flowey who didn’t wave back. But then again, he wouldn’t have been able to even if he wanted to since he didn’t have any arms.

He was just bent over like a sad wilted flower that hadn’t received any love and nourishment in a long time. Chara considered giving Flowey the mulch that Jane had bought a few days ago, but realized that would probably ruin the moment.

Unsure of what to do, Chara approached Flowey slowly. Unfortunately, they had forgotten to put away their knife. When Flowey finally looked up and saw the knife’s edge in the moonlight, he let out a blood curdling scream.

\- “N-no! Back off! Please don’t kill me!” cried Flowey as his entire body shook.

Chara remembered one time in the past when Asriel had held them when they had a panic attack after having a nightmare about their past. He had been like a reliable older brother to them. Sometimes he was almost even a little bit like a dad even though he wasn’t that much older than them.

Since he was a boss monster just like his parents, he would always tower above them. Chara who wasn’t used to being cared for by somebody else couldn’t help but develop an inferiority complex over the height difference.

But now Asriel just looked small and vulnerable. The kind giant had been a fragile little flower all along.

Suddenly, all of their bottled up guilt washed over Chara. Why had they held a grudge against Asriel just because he had prevented them from starting a war against humanity? It wasn’t like he had actually betrayed them. If anyone was a traitor it was none other than Chara themselves.

\- “W-wait! Asriel…!” cried Chara but Flowey had already disappeared into the ground.

Suddenly the door swung open. Jane had been woken up by all the noise and was yawning loudly. She noticed that Chara had collapsed on the porch and was crying like a lost child. She leaned down to their level and started stroking their back.

\- “Oh dear, what is the matter?” she asked in a sweet voice. Was this really the same person who assisted them while slaughtering countless of monsters?

Between the tears, Chara explained what had happened. Chara was expecting her to either comfort them or scold them but she just gave them a confused look.

\- “Huh…? What do you mean, you tried to kill Flowey? Didn’t I command you to do that by progressing the dialogue?” asked Jane innocently.

Chara’s cheeks were burning with shame. They shook their head and bit their lip so hard that it started to bleed. Chara felt sick as the metallic taste spread across their mouth.

\- “What kind of headcanon is that!?” groaned Chara as they shut their eyes tightly. “It’s almost like you’re trying to romanticize everything terrible I have done…”

Jane made a gesture that indicated that she was deep in thought. Her mother always laughed when she did that because she looked so much like her older brother. But Chara could tell that she was genuinely disappointed by the turn of events. This made Chara feel even more like a failure, even if Jane’s interpretation of their actions had been completely ridiculous and illogical.

Finally Jane spoke. Her words surprised Chara.

\- “But you still regret your actions, don’t you?” mumbled Jane as if she was desperately trying to come up with a good counterargument. “Even after you killed everyone else in the Soulless Pacifist run, which wasn’t cool at all by the way, you still spared Flowey, didn’t you? He still showed up as usual after the ending credits and you didn’t even try to attack him, even if you had the perfect opportunity to kill him once and for all.”

Chara swallowed hard and looked down. They could feel the blush spread across their face. Even though they couldn’t see Jane’s face since she was invisible, they could tell that she had a satisfied look on her face.

\- “Why did you spare Flowey in the Soulless Pacifist route if you didn’t care about him? You even lied to him and pretended that you hadn’t killed the others and that everything was fine on the surface. Not to mention you decided to impersonate Frisk since you knew that he liked them. That means you must have still cared about what he thought about you!” continued Jane.

It was starting to get cold outside and the mosquitos were swarming. Jane suggested that they should go back inside, if they didn’t want to become vampire food. Chara could tell that she was just trying to tell a joke to cheer them up even if her humor was just as dry as theirs. Despite everything, a small chuckle escaped Chara’s lips.

\- “Did you spare Asriel because you realized how desperate he was to bring you back even if it meant sacrificing the others? Or was it because he decided to stay in the underground and keep you company by your grave instead of going with the others to the surface?”

They sat down on the bed. Chara hesitated for a brief moment but then laid down on her lap. They used to do that with Asriel when they wanted to be comforted. Jane played with a strand of Chara’s hair.

\- “When you said you wanted to be together with me forever…” whispered Jane in their ear. “You were actually projecting your feelings for Asriel on me, weren’t you? Because you thought that he had abandoned you in favor of his much kinder friend.”

Chara shut their eyes. Slowly a tear formed in their eye.

\- “H-h-how do you know that…?” sobbed Chara weakly.

Jane chuckled and pulled something out that she had hidden in her dress all this time. It was a golden heart locket. She winded up the music box inside and it played a familiar tune. As she held it in front of Chara’s face, they could read the words: “Best friends, forever”. Chara blinked through the tears.

\- “But why do you have it? This is a perfect replica of the one he gave me...”

Jane rustled Chara’s hair playfully.

\- “It came with the physical copy of the game.” she laughed but then she started spacing out again. “Hey, wait a minute… does this mean that there is technically merchandise of you? Maybe your creator lied when he said there wouldn’t be any…”

Before falling asleep, Chara gave her one last smirk.

\- “You’re a true eccentric, aren’t you? No wonder that otaku Alphys tried to ask you on a date during Mettaton’s quiz show.”

A small heart rose from Chara’s chest as they had once again gained some LOVE.


	11. The First Stage of Grief

Sans was cooking spaghetti in the kitchen and humming while listening to an old classic on the radio. He laughed as his baby brother Papyrus showed off his dance moves. The tiny skeleton did somersaults, head spins, backflips and dabbed.

Today Papyrus was dressed up in 90s fashion. He had turned his cap backwards and was wearing baggy jeans, an oversized hoodie and sneakers with flashing lights on them. Sometimes he got bullied for his fashion sense at school but their hateful comments didn’t face the great Papyrus. It was like pouring water on a goose.

Suddenly there was a loud crash as a vase hit the floor and shattered into one thousand pieces.

\- “Oops…!” said Papyrus and made an apologetic face.

But Sans wasn’t angry, he just laughed it off. At least they didn’t have to worry about cuts since they didn’t have any skin on their bones.

Sans loved his baby brother more than anyone else. A few mishaps here and there were to be expected, especially when you have kids. Even though Papyrus was his younger brother, Sans was practically like a father to him. After all, they didn’t have anyone else so they had to look after each other.

Another loud noise was heard. This time Sans frowned. He could forgive a genuine mistake but he didn’t want Papyrus to grow up to be a spoiled brat who thought that it was cool to run around and destroy things for no reason.

\- “W-wait! This time it wasn’t me, brother!” exclaimed Papyrus.

Sans shook his head and handed the broom to his younger brother.

\- “Sure, whatever you say, buddy.” sighed Sans but then he winked. “I will forgive you this time but only because you’re so cute. Lies won’t get you anywhere.”

However, Papyrus truly was innocent this time. In the closet, Kris was hiding together with the red soul. They had been forced to realize that they needed him to save Asriel and had disposed of the heavy metal cage. A human would always be smarter than a video game character.

\- “I thought we had already discussed this!” hissed Kris as quietly as possible.

In the dark world Kris had sat down next to the cage and discussed with the red soul why they needed his assistance. Since the red soul couldn’t get home by himself, he had no choice but to cooperate with Kris.

Kris managed to find some of Gaster’s old research. In other universes many players had failed to save the Deltarune world from being covered in darkness. Kris wasn’t sure if this was their fault or somebody else’s but they didn’t care either.

However, this player was unique. He wasn’t just observing form behind a wall but had somehow entered the game and become a part of it. Kris realized that Gaster must have known that he had this ability and for that reason kidnapped him from the moon.

Kris had decided to call the red soul JohnDoe since that is what the police call an unidentified male corpse. The red soul didn’t like the edgy nickname so they had to shorten it to John instead.

John had told Kris everything that happened after being swallowed by the video game and how he had tried to save his fictional friends. He told Kris that he had heard his sister’s voice on the moon. He was worried that he had dragged her into this mess since she was probably trying to rescue him. Kris couldn’t help but feel sympathy for his sister since she was trying to do the same thing as they were. They both just wanted to rescue their brothers.

\- “If you want to see your sister again, then you’d better settle down before they hear us.” whispered Kris as they peeked through the keyhole and saw the skeleton brothers who had gone back to preparing dinner.

Sans scratched his bald head. A small blush slowly appeared on his face. Papyrus was occupied with folding napkins into small boats to decorate the dinner table. He made sure that each wine glass had one napkin inside of it. Sans scolded him for wasting tissues even if he knew that Papyrus was just trying his best.

\- “Papyrus, could you try to behave today when Tori comes over for dinner? She said that she had something important to talk about.”

Suddenly Papyrus eyes lit up.

\- “You’re finally going to propose!?” he yelled excitedly. “And then you’re going to eat spaghetti just like in Lady and the Tramp! While I play the accordion!”

Papyrus looked happier than that one time John and his little sister had received a Nintendo 64 for Christmas. There was nothing in the world that could surpass how happy they had been back then. Despite everything, Kris couldn’t help but smile at this memory that suddenly appeared in their head.

Sans pointed at Papyrus with the pasta ladle that he was holding.

\- “No way! I just befriended her a few days ago! It’s too early to even ask her out on a date.” laughed Sans.

Once the two brothers had settled down, Sans rubbed his chin as if he was worried about something. Kris noticed that he had a very concerned look on his face. Usually they weren’t very good at reading other people’s emotions. They came to the conclusion that the red soul had made a mental note about Sans’ habits. John was still trying to collect as much LOVE as possible.

And by that he didn’t mean LOVE as in level of violence. Kris thought that this was cheesiest thing they had ever heard and rolled their eyes.

\- “If you keep acting like this…” whispered John under his breath. “Then you will turn out just like the Hero!”

Kris couldn’t help but snort at this statement.

\- “And who exactly was controlling the Hero? It was you!”

Sans’ phone suddenly rang. He went to pick it up. They could hear Toriel on the other end of the line. She had gotten stuck in a traffic jam on the way to Sans’ house.

Lately the weather had gotten worse and school was temporarily closed since the monsters had been advised to stay inside. Kris realized that this was probably a side effect of the dark fountain that was starting to affect the real world.

Kris realized that they had to act fast before the opportunity slipped out of their grasp. Sans was the weakest monster in town, since he only had 1 HP. People always worried about him getting into an accident and kicking the bucket. Sans had always been sick and physically weak. When he was a kid, he would longingly gaze upon the other kids playing basketball on the street while he laid in bed.

Since Papyrus was still young, Kris didn’t think he was a threat. If they managed to finish off Sans first, the tiny skeleton monster was basically free EXP. Before Kris could even finish this thought they felt the red soul twist their insides and bit their lip to prevent themselves from crying out in pain.

John never wanted to play another violent video game ever again. Not after all the things he had been through after arriving in Love-De-Gard and seeing another side of the story of his old favorite video game. He had never played Undertale before, even if he was familiar with the characters since his sister loved that game. But despite that, he knew that there must be something more to these two skeleton monsters.

But Kris was just too determined. Without a second thought they leapt out of the closet and stabbed Sans in the chest before he even had the time to react. Papyrus dropped the bowl with the spaghetti and meatballs on the floor as his vision were dyed red. With a shaky hand, he touched his face and realized that he was covered in his own brother’s blood.

Suddenly Kris started laughing hysterically and their limbs went out of control. John tried his best to stop Kris from committing any more murders. With Kris’ mouth he yelled:

\- “Hurry! Run away while you can! I will try to restrain them!”

Papyrus looked confused for a second but then concluded that whoever this voice belonged to must have been trying to save his life. After looking at Sans’ bloody and dusty remains for a brief second, he ran towards the door, as fast as his legs could carry him. He felt bad for leaving Sans behind but he knew that his brother would have wanted him to survive.

Papyrus wasn’t watching where he was going and collided with Sans and Toriel who had finally arrived at the door. They had been invited by the Deltarune version of Sans to discuss Gaster’s next move. They had concluded that the two versions of Sans must have been clones that Gaster had created for a specific purpose. Neither of them knew why though.

Toriel covered her mouth and rushed in without thinking.

\- “Sans!!!” she screamed in despair. “Oh my god, this isn’t happening!”

Before she could get stabbed by Kris who was swinging their knife around wildly, Sans grabbed her by the arm.

Papyrus was confused and looked back and forth between the dead Sans on the floor and the living Sans right in front of him. Then he suddenly burst out laughing. This sudden change of emotion startled the whole room, even Kris.

\- “Sans, you freaking troll! You scared the crap out of me!” cried Papyrus even though he knew that he wasn’t allowed to swear.

He punched the confused Sans in the stomach playfully.

\- “P-papyrus…?” asked Sans. “Why are you so small?”

The younger version of Papyrus embraced Sans. The blood from his other self dyed Sans’ blue hoodie red. Sans could barely comprehend just how absurd this situation was. Between the tears, Papyrus whispered:

\- “You must have tricked them! You used your ability to teleport to dodge the attack!”

Pablo who had been with Sans this whole time, finally spoke up. He jumped down gracefully from Sans’ shoulder.

\- “He is just like me back then…” said the refined cat. “Denial is the first stage of grief.”

While the group was trying to comprehend the situation, John realized that this was his chance get Kris out of this situation. Sans was too distracted by the crying alternate version of his late brother that he didn’t notice that Kris jumped out of the window. Despite everything John was still a gamer, he recognized when the opposing side was more powerful.

John made Kris run towards the school and return to the dark world. Kris was exhausted but still felt grateful that John had essentially saved their life. They had seen how powerful Sans was earlier when John narrowly dodged his attacks. It was a good thing that he had played so many video games.

However, Kris didn’t have time to rest. They rushed towards the castle as fast as they could. Their steps echoed through the empty dark halls as they headed towards the master bedroom.

Ralsei, the lonely prince was sleeping in a large bed with the most impressive canopy. The room was lit up by thousands of fireflies.

Kris picked him up gently and headed towards the dark fountain. Ralsei’s fur had once again turned dark, just like when they had been on an adventure in the Dark World with Susie. The prince was almost transparent at this point, as if he was fading away. Kris wouldn’t allow this to happen.

They waded into the murky water and lowered Ralsei slowly into the fountain. As soon as he was completely covered in the dark liquid, Kris released their red soul. John hesitated for a brief moment but then he couldn’t help but feel sorry for the prince. He was truly a bleeding heart, both literally and figuratively.

As the red soul released the LOVE that Kris had gained after executing Sans the skeleton in the name of love, the water lit up. Suddenly, pink glittery water rushed out of the fountain. Ralsei’s fur turned back into its pure snow white color. A sacrifice had been made. This was the secret of the fountain of the dark world. The more light the dark world gained, the more darkness spread through the light world.

After falling into the fountain that separated the two worlds, Asriel had lost his memories of his past life and transformed into the dark prince Ralsei. In order to stay alive, the dark fountain needed to be purified. Even though their brother was safe for the time being, Kris knew that this peace was temporary.

Ralsei slowly opened his eyes. He gave Kris a weak smile that melted their heart like chocolate in the sun. His soft paw touched Kris’ cheek as a small blush spread across their face. Ralsei’s voice was raspy when he spoke:

\- “Kris…? Did you save me?”

Kris embraced Ralsei and burrowed their nose in his soft fur. They nodded slowly. Ralsei chuckled weakly.

\- “I knew it! You’re the hero of the Dark World, Kris. The legend was true after all!”

Suddenly the red soul snapped. He couldn’t bear listening to this anymore.

\- “Stop! We’re not the heroes!” he yelled.

Kris gave him a sharp look and held up a finger against their mouth as they hushed.

\- “Don’t be bashful! It’s OK to celebrate our victories. Besides you want to go back home, don’t you? I bet your sister is worried sick about you right now.” threated Kris.

Thankfully, Ralsei didn’t notice the passive-aggressiveness in Kris’ voice. John’s red soul shook but he was defeated. Even if he hated killing fictional characters, he had no choice but to admit that he had committed a mistake back then when he had valued them over his real flesh and blood sister.

The red soul reluctantly went back into Kris’ chest. They moaned in pain as the wound on their chest once again opened up. At least John could give this jerk’s internal organs a good squeeze. Ralsei who was finally able to stand up again, rose up from the water gracefully and scooped up Kris like a princess.

\- “I guess it’s my turn to nurse you back to health.” he giggled as he kissed Kris’ forehead.

Kris’ burrowed their face in his chest as he carried them all the way back to the castle.

\- “I love you.” they whispered.

\- “I love you, too.” Ralsei responded.


	12. Drink Away Your Sorrows

\- “Mochi!” yelled Jane.

Chara sighed. That stupid mutt had run off with Tao again. At first Tao had been confused by the fact that Mochi pretended to be a cat and had barked at it angrily. Eventually Tao recognized its scent and stopped barking abruptly, even though it was still somewhat confused. For a brief moment Chara couldn’t help but think Mochi was a little bit relatable. People were often confused about Chara’s gender. Sometimes even Chara themselves were confused.

The two dogs had headed into the forest and were digging in the ground, as if they were searching for something. Mochi’s white fur was covered in mud when it headed over to Jane. It had something in its mouth.

\- “Huh? What is this?” asked Jane.

Chara peeked over Jane’s shoulder to get a better look. She was taller than them so they had to tiptoe. The mysterious item was a white arrow. Just like Mochi it was covered in a thick layer of mud. Jane dusted it off on her dress and studied it closer.

\- “Is this a treasure?” she asked with a hint of childish glee in her voice.

Chara groaned. She would always pick up useless junk in video games that Chara had to carry around in their inventory, just in case it would later turn out to be relevant to the plot. They snatched the arrow from Jane so they could examine it closer.

Suddenly Chara felt nauseous. The world was spinning and stars danced across their eyes. They felt sick as if holding the arrow had given them a premonition. Jane narrowly caught them as they collapsed and dropped the arrow on the ground. It felt like the world was going in slow motion when Jane called out to them.

\- “What’s wrong? Are you injured? Maybe you need some healing items?”

Jane tried to feed Chara with a croissant from their inventory but Chara had no appetite. Mochi approached Chara and started nuzzling their legs, as if it was trying to comfort them.

\- “It’s just…” begun Chara as their eyes darted back and forth. “Just looking at this arrow fills me with dread.”

Jane’s eyes lit up. She picked up the arrow and put it back inside of her pocket. Chara raised an eyebrow. Why did she always have to challenge fate?

\- “If this arrow is enough to scare somebody like Chara, then there must be some kind of mystery behind it!” cheered Jane who had already started theorizing.

Chara suddenly felt a little bit better and sat up slowly. They were still dizzy but they didn’t feel like they were going to faint anymore. Jane’s excitement must have affected them too, since the mysterious arrow now sparked their curiosity. Chara would never say no to a good video game side quest.

They decided to head over to the town and ask the NPCs if they had any clues what the arrow might symbolize. Unfortunately, the villagers didn’t have much to say about it. The only ones who had unique reactions were Bilby and the Minister. However, this was enough for Jane to get suspicious.

Chara suggested that they should wait until evening and catch Bilby at the bar when he was drunk. They had already memorized the schedules of the NPCs that inhabited Love-De-Gard. At first, Chara had been excited to do good when they had arrived in this world but now old habits were starting to kick in. Chara was glad that they had discovered a new event which momentarily pushed away their nasty desires to kill and feel the rush of serotonin as they grew stronger.

While waiting in the bar, Jane decided to be adventurous and ordered a cocktail. Chara wondered why Wanda would let underage kids drink at her bar but then they remembered that this was all just a video game. Common sense didn’t apply here. Either that, or Wanda wasn’t programmed to react to an event like this.

\- “Do you want to have a sip?” giggled Jane who was already a little bit drunk.

Chara sighed. Wasn’t it enough that she was addicted to the serotonin that released in her brain every time a number increased? Was she going to become addicted to alcohol too?

\- “C’mon! Don’t be like that! Like, live a little…” slurred Jane who was already too drunk to think about the consequences.

Chara’s lips moved towards the straw in slow motion. They weren’t sure if this was a good idea but Jane’s offer was just too tempting. Even if her judgement was usually terrible and Chara had never been forced to follow her lead, they knew that it usually gave them pleasure in the end.

Chara made a face as the bitter taste of alcohol assaulted their taste buds. Unfortunately, they had tried to drink it all in one shot. They couldn’t take it anymore and ended up spraying their drink all over the bar counter.

Wanda and Jane both burst into laughter. Chara blushed furiously. They had wanted to look cool in front of Jane but now they had just turned into a laughing stock.

\- “It’s OK, sweetie!” laughed Wanda between the tears. “You will get used to it eventually.”

Chara raised an eyebrow.

\- “I guess she _is_ programmed to know about underage drinking after all…” groaned Chara without thinking.

Suddenly, Wanda furrowed her brows. This surprised Chara since NPCs usually reacted with confusion when their tongue slipped and they accidentally said something meta.

\- “It seems like Florence was right after all. Is none of this real? How many people know the truth?” whispered Wanda.

The old lady stumbled towards the cupboard. She grabbed a bottle of pills and drowned them with some alcohol. Chara shifted uncomfortably. They didn’t know that there were other video game characters that were also self-aware. Jane was too drunk to read the mood and suddenly laughed.

\- “I guess metafictional video games have become popular lately.” she hiccupped. “But then again this is an old video game from the 90s…”

Chara sighed. The bottles were starting to fill up the entire counter. How much did she drink?

\- “The evening hasn’t even started yet! How come you were able to drown that many drinks?” asked Chara. “You don’t usually drink… do you?”

Finally Jane put her glass down. She laid her head down on the counter to get some rest. A drunken sob suddenly escaped her lips. Chara didn’t know if they felt sorry for her or simply just concerned. After all, they didn’t want her to do something dangerous in real life, since that might end up affecting them too.

\- “Why do you care? You’re just a piece of data…” mumbled Jane.

Chara folded their arms and shook their head.

\- “No, I’m more than that. I’m the feeling that makes you feel pleasure when you accomplish something in a video game.” yelled Chara and pointed at the empty bottles. ”And this is not an accomplishment!”

To tell the truth, not even Chara understood why they were yelling. But for some reason they just couldn’t contain themselves. Maybe this was an effect of the LOVE they had gained. Or maybe Chara had always been concerned that Jane was ignoring reality and resorting to unhealthy means of escapism.

Chara shook their head again. But were they really in the position to judge her? They enjoyed the escapism Jane’s video games brought them but lately they had started to wonder if they needed a healthier coping mechanism.

_Both for her sake and for their own sanity’s sake._

Chara bit their lip. Maybe they shouldn’t have rejected the offer that Flowey had given them? Maybe it would have been better to just live with him peacefully on the surface and forget about erasing the world? Together with Flowey, the only person who understood them, maybe they could have found a way to cope with the situation together.

Chara suddenly felt a pang of guilt when they remembered Flowey’s frightened expression from last night. He had looked like a deer in the headlights. Was it even possible to make up with him at this point? Did they even deserve his forgiveness? What if they got bored again after leaving Love-De-Gard and ended up hurting him again?

Chara’s sorrowful thoughts were interrupted when the door swung open. Bilby had arrived at the bar just like he was programmed to. Thankfully, Chara was still sober enough to remember their reason for coming to the bar in the first place. They tried to shook Jane awake but to no avail.

Wanda and Bilby both chuckled. Of course, Bilby had already ordered a drink. Chara sighed. They were surrounded by drunkards!

\- “Hey, let the gal sleep.” laughed Bilby between the hiccups. “She seems to… have a lot on her mind. I guess this happens once you start to become an adult.”

Bilby looked down at his drink. Chara noticed that he was already drunk and realized that now was a good time to get him to talk. Careful not to wake her up, Chara took the arrow they had found earlier from Jane’s pocket.

\- “Mister Bilby, please tell me what you know about this arrow. I promise you, that this conversation will stay between us. You have my word for it.”

Wanda touched the engagement ring on her finger and Bilby looked away with tears burning in his eyes. Chara wasn’t sure if this was the greatest idea but they just needed to know the truth. Ever since this morning, the arrow had been bothering them.

\- “You know that this world is a video game, don’t you?” asked Chara with a serious expression on their face.

Chara leaned closer and looked him dead in the eye. They considered doing their creepy face to scare him into submission but for some reason they felt the need to explore other options. Bilby sighed. Wanda was preparing another drink for him but he held up a hand to show that he had enough for tonight.

\- “You’re not an ordinary kid.” concluded Bilby.

He furrowed his brows. After having an internal debate, Bilby decided to spill the beans.

\- “The arrow was going to save us all. The minister shot a random kid who would later become known as the Hero. This was done for the sake of preserving our universe. Just like any story, a video game needs a protagonist, doesn’t it?”

Chara grew silent. Wanda was washing the dishes but was secretly taking notes of everything that was being said.

Bilby rubbed his temples. He wasn’t sure if he had just drunk too much alcohol or if the guilt was slowly eating him up from the inside.

\- “That boy…” whispered Bilby in a voice that was barely audible. “He was a nice kid before the incident. He was walking his dog when it happened. I think he lived together with his grandmother since his parents passed away in a boat accident. That poor old lady is all alone now. I heard that she even took a kid in, just because he reminded her of her grandson. She must still be in denial about his disappearance.”

Suddenly the puzzle pieces fit together. Maybe that is why Tao had guarded the arrow for so long because he knew that his owner had been cursed. Chara wondered if his intelligence exceeded a normal dog’s. Perhaps he was even capable of speech?

The depressed guard sighed and continued:

\- “After he was hit by the arrow, we carried him to the castle’s vault and made him wear the cursed armor. It is capable of giving the wearer… delusions of grandiosity. In other words, he genuinely believed that the world was a video game and that he was the center of the universe.”

Chara looked down at their feet. This was just too much for them to handle. Even if Bilby was talking about somebody else, it felt like they had just been called out.

\- “The hero will never stop adventuring. Even when he becomes an old man, he will still remain the same kid at heart. He just lives for the simple pleasure of leveling up in a video game. I don’t know if that is lucky or unlucky… Sometimes I wish I could return to the simplicity of childhood too.” sighed Bilby.

He remembered Noge who was still trying to get his plane to fly. Bilby was sure that one day the kid would become a great inventor. When Bilby was younger he had big dreams too. Now he was just a middle aged divorced man who was drinking his guilt away at the bar like some kind of sad loser.

\- “Maybe it is already too late for me. I will never be able to redeem myself…” muttered Chara and Bilby simultaneously.

They gave each other an odd look. They could hear Wanda chuckle in the background. She had finished the dishes and handed them two glasses of water and some pain killers. Wanda pointed at Jane and Chara lifted up her head gently and gave her some water to swallow down the pills. Wanda removed Jane’s oversized hat and stroked her invisible head. Chara heard Jane mumbled a faint “mother” in her sleep.

\- “That is the wrong attitude, Bilby.” said Wanda suddenly. “At least, you have accepted that you have made a horrible mistake. Florence is still trying to escape reality in the mushroom forest. You may be a drunkard but at least you haven’t stooped so low that you resorted to drugs to numb the pain.”

Wanda shook her head. There was a part of her that wanted to believe that Florence was worthy of a second chance and that he would be able to become clean again. But he had hurt her and Flora too much so she couldn’t forgive him just yet, especially since he hadn’t even tried to change for the better.

Everyone except for Chara froze in place when the loud noise of the Hero’s heavy metal armor echoed across the room. He swung the door open with such a great force that a flower pot fell down on the floor. Wanda gasped when she realized that he still was wearing her lingerie.

Femi who was sitting in the corner of the room, snorted. The waitress Kris (no, not that one!) had started working at the bar after she had been forced to quit her old job at the restaurant. The reason for that was none other than the Hero himself who had sexually harassed her. Kris’ face went pale as she remembered that she was wearing a short skirt today. The Hero immediately noticed and before she knew it his hand was creeping up her tight.

Suddenly Jane flew up from where she was sitting. Apparently she had finally woken up and witnessed the whole scene. Chara jumped out of their seat too because they were worried that she would get hurt.

Much to everyone’s surprise the Hero suddenly forgot about Kris’ pale legs that desperately needed a vacation in the sun and got down on one knee like an honorable knight. Nobody had ever heard the Hero speak before.

\- “My queen, as your humble servant I apologize for my behavior.” said the Hero in a surprisingly child-like and high-pitched voice.

Bilby gulped nervously. Inside of the armor the boy named Takkun was still the same kid, just a little bit delusional. The Hero looked like a hurt puppy when Jane angrily snatched the panties on his head and tossed them in Wanda’s direction.

Still drunk, Jane yelled:

\- “Why the hell would I want you to be my humble servant!? Guys like you make me sick!”

Chara felt personally attacked by this statement even if this entire conflict wasn’t about them. They looked down in shame. But then again, even if their list of crimes was endless they had never tried to sexually harass somebody. If anyone was a creepy pervert it was probably Frisk who chased after everyone’s booty even though they were a kid. They had even tried to get into Asriel's mother’s pants even though she was an old lady.

Femi got up from where she was sitting. She had a satisfied smirk on her face. She walked over to Kris who was still frozen in shock and put a reassuring arm on her shoulder.

\- “That’s right! We girls don’t need a hero. We can be our own heroes.” exclaimed Femi triumphantly as she tried to push up her glasses with her middle finger.

Having been utterly defeated by the sisterhood, the Hero started walking out the door with a dejected expression. Chara almost felt bad for him. They sighed in relief that they didn’t have to physically fight him this time, since they might lose self-control again and go back to their old bad habits.

\- “I never realized that Kris was also a female name…” mumbled Chara absentmindedly.

After the girls finished celebrating their brief victory over the patriarchy, Femi decided to sit down next to Jane and Chara. She leaned over and whispered in her ear. Chara leaned closer so they could also hear. Femi gave Chara a suspicious look and scanned them from head to toe.

\- “I’m not a boy!” announced Chara defensively and lifted up their shirt to show off Frisk’s (still flat) chest as proof.

They weren’t a girl either but the answer seemed to satisfy Femi. Chara groaned. Apparently she was one of _those_ people.

\- “Anyway, there is something that I wanted to show you. Meet up with me at the American house tomorrow.” Femi looked down in shame. “After seeing you chase off the Hero so bravely… It made me realize something about myself. That even if I think it’s wrong, I have never had the courage to speak up.”

Jane furrowed her invisible brows.

\- “What do you mean? Did something bad happen at the American house? I don’t think the father is a bad man even if he is a little… eccentric.”

Femi sighed.

\- “No, it’s not about the Americans. It’s about our neighbors. The husband, Tamaya Heikichi is a fireworks-maker who lives in a chimney together with his wife and their new-born son.”

Femi took a deep breath. It was time to show the world that she was a real feminist not just somebody who reads comics all day and played pretend that she was some kind of super hero with her brothers.

\- “The husband has been beating his wife.” sighed Femi. “We were passing by the chimney on our way to our hideout when we witnessed the scene. Or rather we overheard it, since they were inside of the chimney.”

Femi shook her head.

\- “I know I might not be in position to judge him but I saw the invisible boy there once. The one who looks exactly like you. He didn’t even try to help!”

Jane bit her lip.

\- “He just walked off and said something creepy like “this is love that is love”. Seriously, what the hell is wrong with that kid? First he snuck into Flora’s bedroom at night and then he tried to romanticize domestic abuse…”

Chara noticed that Jane felt uncomfortable. They tried their best to come up with an good counterargument.

\- "But what if you misunderstood the situation? If you only _heard_ them arguing and didn't actually _see_ them, maybe it was actually the wife who slapped the husband?"

Femi's mouth fell open.

\- "How dare you! I heard him apologize to her! That must mean that he, uhhhh..." Femi trailed off, not sure if her theory was correct anymore.

Bilby tried to butt in on the conversation.

\- "Maybe he apologized because he was the one getting yelled at. But isn't it still abuse even if it's the wife who is hitting the husband?"

Femi shot him an angry glance.

\- "I mean, assuming that is what happened. I wasn't there so I wouldn't know..." added Bilby quickly. "Either way, I feel sorry for their kid. It must be hard for him to listen to his parents arguing all the time and hitting each other. Maybe that is why he just won't stop crying..."

Femi was going to say something but lost her trail of thought when Jane stood up abruptly. Chara, who realized that they had accidentally started an intense debate about gender equality, stood up as well. The awkward silence hung heavy in the air.

\- “I feel sick. Let’s go home, Chara.”

Femi shrugged and Kris made sure to shake Jane’s hand politely before she left.

\- “If you ever want to see my show, I will make sure to reserve a spot in the mosh pit for you.” laughed Kris and winked.

Bilby waved weakly. Maybe it was time for him to head home too. Otherwise his liver might give in as he died from alcohol poisoning.

\- “Be careful on your way back home!” yelled Wanda as Jane walked out of the door with Chara’s support.

The pair walked back to the house in silence. Unfortunately, Jane had forgotten to buy octopus kisses so they couldn’t teleport. Chara couldn’t stand the silence anymore.

\- “What should we do about that TERF… I mean, Femi’s request?”

Jane avoided eye contact and didn’t answer Chara’s question.

\- “If this Heikichi guy can make fireworks then we need to visit him eventually. We need it to repair the rocket that will fly us to the moon.” said Chara who was trying their best to look at the situation from a logical perspective.

Jane mumbled under her breath.

\- “I don’t know. I can’t handle this kind of thing…”

Chara raised an eyebrow. Unsure of what to do, they realized that they should probably offer some emotional support.

\- “Do you want to… talk about it?”

Jane opened her mouth for a brief second as if she was about to say something profound but then she just shook her head.

\- “What would be the point of discussing something like this with a fictional character? I’m not _that_ … lonely.”

They finally arrived at the house. Thankfully, the creepy guy wasn’t tied up outside anymore. Chara almost regretted that they let him leave, since it would have been nice to have a punching bag to vent their frustrations on.

\- “I’m not like my brother.” mumbled Jane. “I don’t need fictional characters to comfort me. I’m stronger than that…”

She curled up in bed and tried to suppress a drunken sob. Even though she reeked of alcohol, Chara laid down next to her and gave her a hug.

\- “Let’s go and get the fireworks tomorrow. Then we can finish the rocket so you can rescue your brother and go home again.”

Jane didn’t respond since she had already fallen asleep. A small heart rose from Chara’s chest as they had once again gained some LOVE. But why did this LOVE always emerge from their own chest?


	13. Big Brother is Watching You

Flowey gazed upon Breadman’s peachful face as he rested on the flowerbed. The bread that was his head had gotten moldy and ants were crawling all over it. But despite everything the baker had a smile on his face.

Flowey wasn’t sure how to feel about this. He had seen the lights disappear from the monsters’ eyes many, many times before. But somehow this felt different.

The professor, who was still accompanying Flowey, leaned down and gave him a gentle smile as he picked up the deceased baker. Flowey tried to chase away the ants but they just crawled up on his leaves which made him squirm.

\- “I think he had finally found true happiness.” said the professor suddenly.

Flowey, who was still trying to chase away the ants, gave him an odd look. Then he finally lost his patience and swallowed the ant whole. The professor raised an eyebrow but Flowey just shrugged. Had the professor never seen a carnivorous plant before?

\- “What do mean by “true happiness”? This guy seems to be in a pretty bad shape.” muttered Flowey.

The professor just shook his head. Behind his large glasses, Flowey could see a hint of melancholy in his eyes.

\- “He might have passed away since he didn't change the bread as he usually did but I’m sure he didn’t regret keeping his memories for a little bit longer. Master Gaster told me that he was an amnesiac who could only remember the last few days.”

Flowey snorted. He didn’t see how this made a difference.

\- “What is the point of keeping your memories when everyone else stays the same? The NPCs of Love-De-Gard just follow the same schedule anyway.” Flowey sighed. “Just like mom and dad did…”

Suddenly Asriel’s childhood memories came rushing back. Flowey often tried to suppress them since remembering was too painful but after the “fight” with Frisk (or at the very least he hoped that it was Frisk) in the Pacifist route, the memories had just kept coming back to haunt him. But Flowey knew that he would never be able to go back to that blissful ignorance. Nowadays it was almost impossible to imagine himself acting like the other NPCs.

\- “To be honest, I kind of envy him.” whispered Flowey as he looked down on his leaves, where his feet had once been. “Sometimes I wish I could forget everything.”

They went inside the spaceship. The professor wrapped Breadman in plastic. Unsure of what to say, Flowey kept quiet. Maybe he really did talk too much sometimes. Maybe that was the reason Chara hated him so much. This thought made Flowey very, very sad.

He tried his best not to think negative thoughts since it made his flower vessel wilt a little bit every time. Asriel couldn’t help but be amazed by how flowers were able to sense emotions like that.

Once he had read a book about this in the library in Snowdin. The book was about a social experiment that had been carried out in a monster preschool. There were two flowers in two bottles.

The two flowers were both given the same amount of care and nutrients but the difference was that one bottle had the words “positive thoughts” written on it while the other read “negative thoughts”. The flower that received positive thoughts survived but the other didn’t. It was a murky moldy mess while the other was in full blossom.

Flowey thought about this a lot. Since he was the only one left in the underground, he had decided to plant himself on top of Chara’s grave. Just like when they were still alive, he felt like a decoration.

His flower vessel was a marigold, which had been Chara’s favorite flower. The meaning behind this flower was conflicting though. In flower language, it represented jealousy, grief, despair and mourning but also positive emotions and energy. Even though this seemed contradictory this described his relationship with Chara perfectly.

Sometimes he wondered if the remains of Chara were sending him negative and hateful thoughts from the soil. Now that he thought about it, his roots must have gained nutrients from Chara’s decomposing corpse. Flowey shuddered at the thought as yet another wave of body dysmorphia washed over him.

\- “I’m tired of this!” yelled Flowey all of a sudden. “I’m tired of living like this! I’m tired of being a flower!”

The professor who had finished taking care of Breadman’s corpse, sat down on the floor next to Flowey. For a brief moment, Flowey couldn’t help but wonder why there was no furniture in this room aside from Mochi’s old toys even though the professor spent most of his time in there. In fact the whole room seemed almost surreal, since the graphics were so different from the ones outside. This just made Flowey feel even more disassociated from reality.

\- “When I feel like this…” begun the professor. “I try to focus on the things that bring me joy. Or I try to pick up a new skill.”

Flowey sighed:

\- “I have already tried all of that. There is no meaning to it anymore. Before everyone escaped from the underground, the only thing I wanted was to bring back my friend…”

Flowey bit his lip. Maybe he shouldn’t share too much information about Chara since that might give away their location. But then Flowey shook his head. Why did he still worry about them even after everything they had done to him?

Despite telling himself that, he couldn’t help but worry anyway. Chara had never truly connected with their parental figures Toriel and Asgore. Therefore Asriel had always felt like taking care of them was his responsibility since they were so much smaller than him. In hindsight, it seemed almost silly to think about Chara like that. Despite their small stature, they were still a violent and very dangerous person.

\- “What did you do before meeting your friend?” asked the professor all of a sudden. “What were your hobbies? What other connections did you have aside from your friend and your family?”

Flowey opened his mouth as if he was going to deny this but then quickly shut it. The professor was right, he didn’t really care about anything in particular other than Chara. This sudden realization made Asriel upset so he tried his best to think of something.

\- “Before I met Chara l liked to…. Uhhh.” tried Flowey. “Oh, yeah! Right, I liked to draw and write stories of places I wanted to visit on the surface!”

Then he looked down with a dejected expression on his face.

\- “But the stories that Chara told me, those that were probably about other worlds they had visited, were always much more interesting than reality…”

Suddenly the professor had a satisfied smirk on his face. He pushed his glasses up with his thumb.

\- “In other words, you have been craving escapism from reality for most of your life. Even before your tragic accident that eventually turned you into a flower.” concluded the professor as if he was holding a speech about his latest test subject at a university.

Flowey and the professor went outside. It was afternoon and the sunset colored the sky in different shades of orange and pink. The two of them decided to go on a walk together.

\- “I guess you’re right...” admitted Flowey. “Even now I can’t help but wonder what Chara would have said and done if they had been with us right now.”

The professor nodded as if he was hyper-focused on taking notes of everything that was being said during this conversation.

\- “I think you are struggling with being independent.” said the professor. “You always define yourself by your relations to others and has trouble cutting ties with your friend even if you know that it would be beneficial your mental well-being.”

Flowey gave the professor an odd look.

\- “Cutting ties…? Geez, why does it sound like you’re… speaking from experience?”

The setting sun reflected in the professor’s glasses which made his expression unreadable. Suddenly a small smile appeared on his lips.

\- “Are we really playing this game?” groaned Flowey suddenly which took the professor by surprise. “Do you really think that I can’t read you like an open book?”

The professor realized that he had been found out. He sighed. This darn flower wasn’t as naïve as that poor boy Terry.

\- “If you’re trying to trick our dear friend JaneDoe with your flattering words, you had better watch out. I have seen her in action, both she and Chara can be pretty brutal when they want to be.” smirked Flowey who was happy that he had turned this conversation around to his advantage.

The professor pulled a hand through his white hair. Suddenly he had an air of overconfidence over him.

\- “I guess appealing to her empathy was doomed to fail from the start. I tried my best to find out as much information about her as I could, in order to manipulate her emotions and gain her trust. Her favorite food, the place she was born, her dreams for the future…”

Even though Flowey hated to admit it, his interest was suddenly piqued. Of course, the manipulative old man saw this as an opening.

\- “You want to know more about your dear friend’s partner, don’t you? After all, she was the very person who created them. This information could be useful when trying to communicate with Chara in the future, to avoid any more violent encounters!”

Flowey gave the professor an angry look. He just wanted to wipe that smug grin off his face. Or even better run a bunch of friendliness pellets through his body. But he also knew that this was an amazing opportunity to gather more information about Jane that he might never get ever again.

\- “I don’t like you.” said Flowey. “You sound like me. And one of me is already too much!”

Finally, the professor leaned down to Flowey’s level. Flowey could tell that he was trying to create a connection here.

\- “I guess I will take that as a yes.” said the professor triumphantly. “So, what is it that you want to know about the young lady who we refer to as JaneDoe?”

Flowey couldn’t tell if this old man was a genius or the ultimate creep.

\- “Have you, perhaps by any chance, read George Orwell’s novel “Nineteen Eighty-Four”? asked Flowey who had read every book.

The professor laughed. But the smile didn’t reach his eyes.

\- “Let me be your Big Brother.” quoted the professor who had also read every book.


	14. Runs In the Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Contains some spoilers for the bad ending of the game "Dweller's Empty Path" (and some weird headcanons).

Sometimes when she closed her eyes, Susie could see the place where she was born. As the memories flooded back, she could smell the lush tress and imagine the orange leaves rustling in the cool autumn breeze, signifying the end of summer. She would remember her younger self, the Susie who spelled her name with a y and wore a white silk ribbon in her hair, ready for her first day at school.

Her mother Zusy had insisted that she should dress up for her special day. After all, moments like these would slip out of your grasp in you didn’t treasure them. Even though Suzy had been excited to start school (Susie couldn’t fathom how her younger self could ever have thought that school was going to be fun), she had been so stubborn that they had arrived late on her first day.

Susie had always hated that ribbon. It made her feel infantilized, like she was just a cute kid who needed to be protected from the real world. Susie didn’t want any of that, she wanted power. But that was just because she had always been overcompensating, to hide her deepest insecurities.

Susie had disliked Kris since the first time she saw them. Kris had just seemed like that kind of introverted guy who would just snap one day and bring a gun to school, just to chicken out at the entrance and run back home with tears in their eyes.

But she had also felt a strange kind of kinship with the boy who sat alone at lunch and whose gender was so fluid that not even Kris themselves could solve this riddle. Susie remembered the first time she had shoved them against a locker and accidentally misgendered them. Kris had told her they were non-binary. They had spat at her face while they uttered those words. Words that were shaky, spoken in a hushed voice but still carried a lot of pride.

For a brief moment Susie, who had realized very early on that she liked girls and was more butch then her mother had ever wished, wondered why she acting so hypocritical.

That was because Susie had chosen Kris as her favorite victim early on. She just couldn’t help it; it was in her nature as a beast to want to consume everything, even her classmates. Susie had just chosen Kris because they seemed like the kind of person that nobody would miss if a little accident happened.

If she hadn’t seen Toriel’s terrified face as she caught Susie in the middle of the act in the school hallway, maybe she would actually have gone through with it. But when her own mother’s face flashed by her eyes, like a ghost from the past, Susie had dropped Kris like a hot iron and rushed outside.

She didn’t care that it was a normal Friday and everyone back at the classroom were still trying to get through the day until they could finally go home for the weekend; she just needed to get out of there. Susie was running and didn’t know where she was going. Eventually she stopped when she was completely out of breath since she realized that one cannot run from themselves, at least not physically.

Once upon the time Susie had been just like the human Kris. She had been the outsider who didn’t belong. In the world she and her mother came from they had just been second class citizens.

Everyone was divided into three different classes like some kind of caste system. There were the humans, the origin-types, the hybrids, the natural types and the lowest of them all, the beast-types who wanted to consume everything in their path. Susie had been unfortunate enough to be born from a mother who happened to be a reformed beast-type.

The rumor said that her mother had once been a human who came from another world. But Susie didn’t believe in that kind of crazy talk. After all, that would mean that Susie was also secretly a human which was just impossible to imagine, so therefore it just couldn’t be true.

Susie had always been the type who was quick to deny things that made her feel uncomfortable. Despite this her curiosity had been sparked when she was cleaning the attic and found an old photograph of three smiling people: her mother, a human and a splitting image of Kris’ brother. This old photo filled her with a sense of dread, like something just wasn’t right but she couldn’t put her finger on it.

The human in the photo had reminded her of Kris. But Susie didn’t feel like confronting Kris about this directly. She didn’t know why, it just didn’t seem like a wise decision. Instead she had decided to visit the old turtle Gerson. Susie had a theory about Asriel’s mysterious doppelganger and had decided to ask the wise old man about Asgore’s past.

After pretending to enjoy some coffee to seem more adult than she actually was and listened to Gerson’s tale how he had once defeated a whole army of humans with his trusty hammer which he had already told the kids one million times, Susie laid the picture on the table.

Gerson’s eyes grew wide as he stared at her in disbelief. Then his expression shifted drastically. For a brief moment his eyes looked glassy and Susie wondered if he was going to cry, but Gerson was just filled with a quiet sadness as he gazed upon the old memories which had been immortalized in the pictures of the past.

After a long pause and a deafening silence, Gerson’s wrinkled finger pointed at the bespectacled goat monster next to Susie’s mother in the photo. He was grinning and secretly gave the human bunny ears. The human had a blank expression on their face which was partially obscured by their long bangs.

\- “This young man…” Gerson’s voice was quiet and raspy. “He is a splitting image of Asgore when he was a wee lad.”

A nostalgic smile spread across Gerson’s face.

\- “Back when he was young, he always had his nose buried in a thick book in the library. That was why he always wore those dorky glasses. They were bigger that bottle caps!” said Gerson as a hearty laugh escaped him.

Susie sipped the coffee which was now cold. She had already eaten all of the cookies that Gerson had offered her. Crumbs were covering the old and worn-out tablecloth but thankfully Gerson didn’t seem to notice. Susie gathered the crumbs in a little pile and poured them into the disgusting cold coffee before she drank the bitter slimy mess in a single sip.

Susie hated coffee but she hated wasting food even more. That wasn’t because she was economic or because she was secretly poor like everyone thought. In fact, she lived in a large mansion in one of the more luxurious neighborhoods outside of town and even had her own private butler.

Susie remembered the disappointed expressions of Snowy and Monster kid when they had seen the limousine that picked her up after school. They had already made up an entire sad backstory in their heads why the cruel bully Susie was just lonely and misunderstood. Susie put on her coolest designer shades, rolled down the window and stuck out her tongue as the two kids stood there flabbergasted as her butler accelerated way past the speed limit.

She had always just had this primitive desire to consume no matter how full she was. There was no logical explanation or tragic past that romanticized her actions. Susie knew that there was no cure; she would always be a beast. It was just in her nature.

However, the old man paid her no mind. With his back turned to her, Gerson was sitting in his creaky old rocking chair and stared into the flames in the cozy old fireplace which gave his cottage a homey feel.

For some reason, Susie couldn’t help but feel nostalgic; she had missed this feeling ever since she had moved into the huge but also hollow mansion. The only thing that had kept her entertained was the huge pearl that she had found in the pond in their large and impressive garden. As cold-hearted as the old Gaster might have been, he had always had a green thumb. Every morning he would stroll through the garden and talk to each and every flower as if they were all his children.

Much to her surprise the pearl had turned out to be her neighbor’s head since she had separated herself from the clam to go for a nice swim during the hot summer day. A normal kid would probably have screamed but Susie had just been ecstatic about making a new friend since she was just that lonely.

The owner of the mansion, her father who she had never met before her mother’s passing was just as cold as her master bedroom during the winter. Sometimes she wondered if he even was her real father.

Susie still hadn’t figured out how a skeleton monster like Gaster who was old enough to be her great-grandfather could have reproduced with a beast like her mother.

Susie woke up from her day-dreams when Gerson, who had been a smoker for the most of his life, suddenly had a coughing fit. She cursed quietly when she accidentally spilled her coffee all over the tablecloth. Her attempt to be discreet had once again ended in an utter failure. Why did she always have to mess everything up?

After collecting his thoughts for a brief moment, Gerson continued his story:

\- “But one day Asgore found an injured human child who had been locked up in the lab located in the outskirts of town, where nobody ever goes. Asgore’s large ears had picked up on her desperate pleas.” continued Gerson without turning away from the fire. “The human’s name was Krystal but she didn’t like having such a petite feminine name, so she asked everyone to call her Krys.”

Gerson shook his head.

\- “Krys would always wear this oversized poncho to hide her curves. Even though everyone thought that she was beautiful…”

For some reason Susie couldn’t keep her mouth shut.

\- “Maybe they were non-binary… Just like Kris?” mumbled Susie.

Gerson gave her an odd look, as if she was speaking in a foreign language. Susie sighed and leaned back in the chair. She had just managed to explain to Gerson what a lesbian was the other day, so she didn’t feel like having this conversation once again. Ugh, why did labels have to be so complicated?

\- “But she was a feisty tomboy!” laughed Gerson. “She would always compete with Asgore who she saw as her greatest rival. Even though he was the one who had taught her how to handle a spear in the first place!”

Susie furrowed her browns. There was one thing that she just didn’t understand.

\- “But why were Krys and Asgore hanging out with my mother? I recognize the background of the photo; it’s the forest outside of my childhood home. I think Asgore would have mentioned it if he had ever visited the world I came from…”

Gerson finally looked away from the flame.

\- “That I do not know…” he lowered his head. “But the story of Krys and Asgore didn’t end happily. In the end, she betrayed Asgore and joined the human revolution. Together with her wife, a talented cleric who had always been against the integration and was one of the few humans capable of magic, they sealed the monsters in the underground.”

Susie was at loss for words. She had read about this in history class but had never really paid attention since she was either sleeping in class or ditching school. All she knew was that Asgore had single-handedly collected seven human souls and broke the barrier before she was born.

Nobody knew what had happened to the human souls afterwards. Some monsters gossiped that he had fused them with the flowers that he was growing in his flower shop which was why he never sold anything. Susie, who secretly hated horror stories, didn’t like this theory at all.

Gerson continued:

\- “Nobody knew her motive for betraying her best friend, but the rumor said that somebody had tricked her into thinking monsters were a threat to all of humanity because of our ability to fuse with human souls. Even though there are no reports of such an event ever happening…”

Susie cocked her head and folded her arms.

\- “But if that is true, how did they know it was possible to fuse in the first place?” asked Susie who had almost fallen asleep but was now wide awake.

Gerson rubbed his temples as if he suddenly had a migraine.

\- “The legend says that a human girl fused with a terrifying monster that killed her beloved little sister. Mad with grief, she absorbed the monster’s soul and became a terrifying being with immense power. She hid among the common folk and posed as a natural-type in your world.”

Susie’s mouth was dry when she spoke.

\- “But I thought that nobody had ever seen a human fuse with a monster?”

Gerson avoided eye contact as he skillfully dodged Susie’s question. She knew he was hiding something.

\- “Eventually, she joined forces with a dark lord named Zera. Nobody knows how their union was created but together they were an unstoppable force…”

Suddenly the door swung open and Gerson abruptly stopped talking. All the colors disappeared from his face when he saw who the uninvited guest was. Susie turned around and was equally shocked when she saw her father at the door, dressed in his old dark robes.

\- “Father…!” exclaimed Susie as she sat up quickly. “What are you doing here!? You weren’t following me… were you?”

Without even uttering a single word, the old scientist walked over to the coffee table and picked up the old photograph. Before Susie had the chance to protest he threw it into the fireplace.

Then he turned to face the old man Gerson who had frozen in place like a rabbit who was staring into the musket of a hunter. Gaster’s lip curled upwards into a chilling smile. Susie was so shocked that she couldn’t even speak when her father wrapped his bony hands around Gerson’s neck and snapped it.

As the lights disappeared from the old man’s eyes, Susie suppressed a sob. Slowly the old man turned to dust.

\- “Ashes to ashes, dust to dust…” whispered Gaster. “He didn’t have much time left anyway. Nobody will question his passing and assume it was because of old age.”

Then he took a broom and gathered the late Gerson’s dust in a small pile, just like how Susie had done with the cookie crumbs earlier. Susie realized that he didn’t feel any compassion for the life he had just extinguished.

After he had finishing cleaning up the evidence, he threw the pile of dust into the fireplace. Susie’s vision was blurred by her tears as she saw Gerson’s ashes blend together with the picture of her mother.

\- “But why…?” whispered Susie as her long bangs cast a shadow over her face.

Gaster leaned down and gently swept her hair aside to prevent it from getting into the fire. Suddenly Susie felt something soft brush against her face. It was the old silk ribbon that Susie’s mother had given her when she was a child. Susie didn’t have the heart to throw it away even after she had changed her name because it reminded her too much of her late mother’s name. Just looking at her old name was enough to trigger a panic attack.

But then Susie was suddenly filled with determination. Gaster’s smile suddenly died when she looked him dead in the eye with her most fierce expression. Gaster had extinguished the fire in the fireplace but there was still a fire burning in her heart. Susie asked the question that had been burning in her mind since she had first met Gaster.

\- “I know that you aren’t my real father! I was a clone of my mother, wasn’t I?”

Gaster rose slowly and gracefully from where he was sitting.

\- “How very, very interesting. At last, you have uncovered the despicable truth. I’m not surprised; you were always a sharp young lady even if you decided to throw away your education.”

Susie gritted her teeth. At first she had been scared of him but now she was just furious and wanted answers.

\- “Why are doing this? What is your goal!?” yelled Susie. “Why did you… pretend that we were family?

Gaster who had already passed through the door, turned around and looked at her before disappearing. Susie was shocked when a single tear ran down Gaster’s cheek. He clutched his heart dramatically. Susie couldn’t tell if this was another one of his theatrics or a genuine heartfelt emotion.

\- “You are all my children. Even if it pains me, I did this for your sake. The truth is much more painful, than you could ever imagine, young Suzy.”

Susie ran towards Gaster and tried to catch him but he disappeared in the blink of an eye. Susie was left all alone with only the singing birds as her company. One million questions clouded her mind.

But a fire had been lit in her chest. She was going to figure out this riddle and confront Gaster eventually. That was the moment when she decided to look for Gaster and not give up until she found him and got a satisfying answer.

Maybe she could ever discover her own purpose along the way.

Then her stomach made a loud noise and once again Susie had returned to her beastly nature. Even though she knew that it was disrespectful she went back inside and raided Gerson’s cupboard. At least it was better than attacking her classmates. Besides the food would spoil anyway if she didn’t eat it now.

\- “Bless his soul…” whispered Susie between the tears and the crunches.


End file.
